Crying over nothing~

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by hearts and roses, Feb 12, 2008.

  1. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    easy child told me the other day that she's been crying over nothing. She said she doesn't feel sad, but that she feels very sentimental and fragile. For instance, she told me that the slightest bit of sappiness in a commercial will have her reaching for the tissues. And if she thinks of anything that was meaningful (happy) or clearly 'wrong' from her past relationships, between us, between her and difficult child, old boyfriend's, anyone, she will tear up. She said she's just felt so weepy.

    I asked her if it was bothering her and she said not really, but that it's definitely noticeable and after the first couple of times she really started to wonder what's up with her. She said that while flipping through channels she came upon "A Knight's Tale" with Heath Ledger and starte bawling like mad! Now I get it, cutie gone forever, but...this seems extreme to me.

    Back in December when she was home for Christmas she had mentioned to me then that she'd been feeling like she was *possibly* depressed and filled with anxiety. I told her to let her Dr know at her next appointment (that week). She didn't - she doesn't like acknowledging that she may deal with depression or anxiety as to her it seems then she would be perceived as being like her sister (difficult child) - someone she truly has no empathy for at all anymore.

    I am a wee bit worried that my hard working, high achieving easy child may fall into a slump if she doesn't take care of this or at least see a DR about it, you know? I've made sure that she has as her supplements, vitamins, etc. I know she's eating well and healthy at least. She claims that she is taking her vitamins/supplements, albeit not daily. I think she could benefit from more exercise, but you know, I can't be there in NY MAKING her get on a treadmill or go swimming.

    I am going to ask her if she wants to see our regular DR about it next Monday - easy child has a 3 day weekend and could be home. I just don't think it should be ignored but I don't want to push too hard with her as that tends to make her retract.

    Any advice? Am I making too much of it?
  2. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    I'd encourage her to see her doctor. Small things add up and there's no shame in feeling some angst. Either that or she might decide that going to a school counselor (most schools have them) to discuss her pressure.

    According to those in the Restaurant/Food industry, culinary school is one of the most high pressured types of schools to attend. Sabotage, is NOT unheard of and there's a lot of people that you have to please. That coupled with living away from home, living in the city, and having to cope with the usual daily grind could be a bit much for her.

    medications may not be the answer, but if she's got the blues talking to someone familiar with her current environment might just do the trick.

    I'm within the 5 boroughs and have done the daily trek into the city. It's NOT a ton of fun!!

    I hope she'll see the doctor or at least the guidance counselor at the school.

    Good luck!

  3. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Thanks Beth. Last week I had to send her some things and I slipped into the envelope the contact information for counseling at her school. I am hoping that she looks into it.

    Her school is not in the city. She's up in Poughkeepsie area, but you're correct - culinary schools are high pressure and hers is supposedly the most difficult and competitive school out there so I know she's having to work really hard in EVERY class in order to do well. Their classes do not last an entire semester either. They change every 3-6 weeks. Therefore, they don't get the time to skate ever - it's constant work and constant focus and constantly dealing with a new class, new groups, and new teachers (and their styles of teaching). Almost all the chefs are from Germany or France and they are all VERY strict. I know the pressure must be building on her. I hope she will look into something to help ease the burdens. Apt hunting with her boyfriend certainly can't be helping much either! I think they are rushing things and should be solely focusing on their classes rather than trying to set up house together. I mean, what's the rush, right?

    Anyway, thanks for your thoughts.
  4. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    Is it possible easy child is experiencing a major case of homesickness? It can cause some of the same symptoms but not as severe as depression. When I first moved with husband to Ohio I was a young bride of 20. I'd never been away from home. That first year was rough on me. I wouldn't say I was depressed, but I was definately homesick. And it sure didn't take much to make me teary eyed and blubbery.

    Probably not a bad idea to have to speak to the doctor about it, though. Especially since you know she's under alot of stress.

  5. Star*

    Star* call 911

    Any chance she's pregnant? :love-very:

    I'm thinking she may have a hormone imbalance too - which if shes tight lipped about the depression thing - she may be more comfortable with the words "hormone imbalance"????

    And if she IS pregnant - That IS a hormone imbalance.

    Daisy has a good point too - home sickness - it's a holiday coming up, and she may be thinking of happier days. ?????

    I kinda agree with crying over Heath Ledger - I had to turn the channel - I knew I'd cry. Just such a waste. And I'm not pregnant or depressed.

    Because if I were pregnant - I would die.

    Hope you can get some of your good Mom advice to stick -
  6. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Star, I nearly DID die when I read that! Thanks for the heart attack. Jeesh.

    I do not *think* she preggo, but could be some hormonal stuff going on.

    Lisa, I think you may be on to something with the homesickness thing. Your comments had me thinking back to last year when she was first away at school and later in VA for 5 months. After that initial honeymoon period of being back at school she did go through a bit of a homesickness. We visited a lot then. We've been averaging every 2-3 weeks since she went back this past December 2nd, so its not been too bad, but maybe that's a part of it. I think she's coming home this weekend for a day and night (I think without the boyfriend-yeah!). Of course I can't wait to see her and maybe it will give me an opportunity to see what it's all about too.

    Pregnant, jeez Star, now I have to go change my shorts!:tongue:
  7. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Jo, pregnant was my first thought. That was the ONLY symptom I noticed in the first 4 months of my 1st pregnancy. I thought it was just the "blues". It was, but NOT the kind I was expecting.

    Culinary school is VERY tough. Please get her to talk to your doctor, her doctor, SOME doctor. And maybe suggest it is not because she could be "difficult child-ish" but that it could be due to the stress of live with difficult child as part of her life, that the stress/tension/anxiety could be built up and needing to be dealt with. And now that she is away from home her system says, hey, no "difficult child-sis", lets get this stuff outta here and is working on making her face things. Or it could be a combination of many things.

    The visit to the doctor for a checkup is the first thing. Then problem medications and a therapist, if she will go to one.


  8. Star*

    Star* call 911

    Here .........(passes Jo G a Depends)

    YUR VELKOMME:tongue:
  9. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    easy child once gave in to see a therapist and I thought it was great. easy child thought otherwise - just a very private person unwilling to open up to a 'stranger'. I feel for easy child, I really do, I understand her reasoning. I've already told her that what she's experiencing is not gfgness - its just a little help coping with a stressful right NOW, not always. Big difference.

    I spoke with her again today and she said she would think about it but is now downplaying her drying jags. She's coming home this weekend and *hopefully* will agree to at least see our reg dr on Monday.

    Thanks for Depends Star. Reeeeeaaaaaal funny~:tongue: