I've read the posts today about detaching, and finally the light came on -- my difficult child is happy doing what she is doing, she wants to be that way, its her choice. I really do get it. BUT then the "but's" start. Am I being responsible by letting her do what she wants, am I throwing her to the wolves????? Because of her low cognitive ability will she ever be able to make competent choices that are in her own best interests???? She was happy last year too, and told us frequently during her 9 month stint at home that she is quite capable of taking care of herself, because she is still alive. However, not having a place to live and sleeping with dozens of guys is not healthy lifestyle choice. As I ponder all of this I do still sort of get it -- she wants that kind of life --- just as I want a simple life, I don't have a job exactly at my skill level, I don't make as much money as I could, I don't change furniture, cars, etc. as often as say "Paris Hilton" would and the Hiltons of the world would probably have the same concerns about me (if they loved me as I love my difficult child) as I do about my child. Some more rambling. This is such a great site to come to.