difficult child came for a visit

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by Nancy, Aug 25, 2012.

  1. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    My birthday was yesterday and difficult child texted on Thursday to say she had a job ointerview near us and would come over after to see me. She brought me a lovely card, a relevant very nice birthday card about realizing she didn't make things easy on me growing up and she now realizes I was always there for her, etc, etc. I was really very surprised and told her how much it meant to me. I'm actually amazed that she remembered my birthday and took the trouble to get a card, more than she has done in the past several years.

    She brought a load of laundry over to do and while the clothes were drying I took her to the grocery store to get some paper products she needed. She is looking for another job and I gave her an article from our paper about a company who was expanding their work force and was hiring 100 people. She said she will go there next week and I hope she follows through. It would be a factory job but its steady work in a good community and pays well and they make high end mixers so it's soemthing she could handle physically.

    She mentioned that she wants to move closer to here (I almost choked) and that her girlfriend was moving back to our city and they may get an apartment together. That would be good, I like her girlfriend and frankly she does not live in a good area now. I didn't ask a lot of questions, I know she is drinking a lot and smoking pot and spends every dime she has on partying but she still looks good and was pleasant to have around.

    I'm thankful that she seems to be doing better than we could have hoped.

  2. Calamity Jane

    Calamity Jane Well-Known Member

    Nancy, Happy Birthday!

    Maybe a light bulb is flickering somewhere in her brain, the beautiful, thoughtful card I believe shows that. The partying may wind down - it truly does get old after awhile. I pray she'll go for that job and get it...that would be fabulous. Maybe then she'll grow up and see all this silliness for what it is. I'm glad you were surprised on your birthday - it's amazing how we have to count our blessings and be moved almost to tears by a card!
  3. AmericanGirl

    AmericanGirl Guest

    Happy Birthday Nancy!!!

    I am so happy that you were able to spend some peaceful time with your daughter. Sounds like she is making some progress. I think the card was a big indicator, kindof like a small step nine.

    One step at a time.

    Hope you had a wonderful day!!!
  4. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I'm thrilled that your birthday included pleasant time with difficult child. Yeah, I know too well that we have to lower our expectations but...we can still celebrate positive steps. Hugs. DDD
  5. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    Happy Birthday!! I am glad your daughter remembered and reached out.

    Sounds like she may be getting a little weary of her lifestyle... Crossing fingers for you.
  6. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Happy Birthday Nancy! I'm happy to hear that your daughter came for a visit and bought you a lovely card which touched your heart, that is a positive step in the right direction. Hope your day was a really good one.......
  7. dashcat

    dashcat Member

    What a lovely birthday gift. And i don't mean just the card! She loves you and she knows you want the best for her. I'm so glad she was there on your birthday!

  8. exhausted

    exhausted Active Member

    Happy late Birthday Nancy-I hope you had a nice day. Good job for her. There is some part of her that is still there. It must feel good to have her remember your B-day! :)
  9. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Happy Birthday, Nancy!! Sorry I didn't see this yesterday. Good for difficult child . . . I have a soft spot in my heart for that girl. I'm still hoping for a great outcome for both of you.

    Enjoy the nice moment. She obviously loves you.

  10. toughlovin

    toughlovin Guest

    Yes Happy Birthday Nancy!!! I think it says a lot that she remembered your birthday and brought you a card. What I have realized is at this point all we can do is have as much of a relationship with them that they will allow that is not enabling... she obviously wants to stay connected to you. That is good.

  11. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Another belated birthday wish and much happiness to you! It is wonderful that difficult child remembered your special day and realizes that you are/were a great mom. -RM
  12. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Hi Nancy, Happy Birthday!

    Another here that thinks it wonderful that your difficult child got you a card and had loving things to say to you.

    Hoping your difficult child finds another job soon and always hoping for sobriety for her.