help.how do i get rid of the bottle?

[needabreak]

o.k. he is 5 and still takes a bottle mostly to help him go to bed.i feel when he is ready to give it up he will.but he has not done that yet.its like i have enough promblems with everything else going on i just have not had time to tackle this subject.my other son stoped the bottle when he was two.i just thimk if i take it away it will make things worse.i have tryed a couple of times but it was just insane here.so any ideas.the only thing he drinks is milk. :rolleyes:

 

[tiredmommy]

First off, does the bottle have only water? If not, you'll need to start diluting down any juice to help protect his teeth from decay. The next step would be to help him become attached to something else that will comfort him to sleep, like a stuffed animal or blanket. The problem is that you may not want to put too much energy into this. As you said, he will give it up when he's ready. Kids on the autistic spectrum often lag behind in developing self-soothing skills.

 

[SRL]

My kids didn't use bottles but they did use pacifiers and they were very, very attached. difficult child was especially and given all the other issues he was past 4 when I finally tackled it. I'm sorry to say that despite trying other things, the only thing that worked was going cold turkey. When it came to him and his sister, I planned ahead, made sure we were going to be home most of the time, and that their dad didn't have any night meetings so he could attend to the other children. Then I gave all of my attention to difficult child and let him fuss and fret plus I held and rocked him at bedtime until he was used to being without it . He did have a blankie and that became his lone comfort item from then on.

This is hard for any mother but cold turkey works on bottles and pacifiers if you make up your mind to be tough for the few days or weeks needed. This is your 5 year old with ADHD/ODD? It may make things worse during withdrawl but the other aspects such as social rejection and teeth damage are worth the effort on an issue like this, in my opinion.

 

[needabreak]

yes im sorry i for got to say that it gets a little confusing sometimes.i just want to try to avoid a situation with him.i know im the mother but if that soothe him to go to sleep i dont know what else to do.he has very nise teeth.but when he does fall asleep i take it away.now he only had a pacifyer up until he was 6 month.

 

[SRL]

Since this is your 5 year old with ADHD/ODD I think you need to take the plunge. No matter what you do it will be difficult for him for a short period--there's no avoiding that most of the time for a child who has had a comfort item for so long. You might try replacing the milk with water but most likely that will only drag it out.

Does your child see a dentist regularly and does he/she know of your problem? They usually go ballistic about bottle use at bedtime because even though the teeth may look fine on the surface, decay can form from the sugar in milk or juice and cause permanent damage. I know how hard it is but your kiddo is old enough for you to reason with on this as well as to understand that his friends at school would tease him like crazy if they knew. Boys of his age still use blankies and stuffed animals every night but they don't use bottles. Make sure he knows that when you go for it--he likely won't care, but he needs to know anyway.

You will need help at bedtime for the first few nights to deal with your little one. Do you have someone who could be there?

 

[needabreak]

i wish i had some one here.my mom would come over but she can not stand the yelling from difficult child.i think that is why i have held off for so long.because of the way he acts.he can get very vilontwhen he is his normal self.i say that cause when he takes his medicine he is like two different people.

 

[SRL]

Can you assign your mom to easy child fo those nights?

 

[needabreak]

yeh i guess i could but he has been very clingy to me latley not wanting to leave my side.its very hard to leave him with her when he wants me so bad.

 

[totoro]

Sorry you are struggling... I was so worried about this also. My difficult child 5.5 breast fed until 17mos, the only reason she stopped was because I had to leave town for a few days. She had never had a bottle before that, would not take one!!! So she latched onto that bottle after that... which made me feel horrible. I should have just given her the sippy cup... but who knew how bad she was?
She never had a blankie or a pacifier or a stuffed animal. So she was getting close to 4 and she still hadn't potty trained either and we didn't yet realize what was up with her, so we were of course thinking she would always have the bottle and diapers!!!
Now I realize it was her severe Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) for both of the issues. As well as some of the BiPolar (BP).
But she has some real oral issues toungue thrust, drooling, bitting nails, chewing hair. So of course I look back now and see the bottle as one more vice. We only gave it to her with milk upon waking, before nap and before bedtime, but she had to have it!!!

We stopped the am one first, changed to a sippy cup...she fought it a bit. We cheered her on... she regressed at times. We tried to never get mad at her. Then the nap one went away.... finally the pm one also. It wasn't easy it took a couple of weeks, and I think this was the time she adopted her stuffed puppy...
We tried giving them away to babies etc. she was having none of it. Basically when she was ready she was ready. As with potty training for her, at 4 yo she was ready.
I know you are dealing with different disorders than me and a boy, but maybe something will help!!!
Our 2.5 yo we just one day took the bottle away and showed up in the am with a sippy cup and said here... I was so stressed about it with the older one that I just went for it with difficult child 2 she was fine... but she also sucks her thumb and has to have her towelly... Occupational Therapist (OT) believes she has Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) but opposite of difficult child 1 (understimulated)
Anyway good luck... go with your gut you know what is best!!!