Have 18 yr old difficult child daughter, who dropped out of high school and ran away the week she turned 18. If you read my thread from January you have a pretty good background of her. She is still living and I talk to her weekly. I am in CA, she is in MS where my parents are. But after stealing from them, they are no longer on speaking terms. She will not call or go see them to apologize and they just keep waiting on her to. I havent seen my daughter since October 08. She is living with a new set of friends, about the 10th place she has lived since leaving CA. She has no job and no car. She just told me that she was arrested a while back (who knows when or for what, she would not say) and a friend posted bail for her. She skipped bail and now there is a warrant for her arrest. She owes a bail bondsman $1500.00. I tried to calmly talk to her about what she was going to do to handle the situation and was told that she spent 4 hours in jail and was not going back. She "jumped bail" (I am not even sure what that means, I think it is not showing up in court) because she said she would have had to spend 10 days in jail and she just could not do it. She was raised in a Christian home and went to a private Christian school from K5 thru 8th grade when we moved to MS and she started public school. It was 10th grade when she was diagnosed severely ADD and it has been a struggle since. She will not take her add medication so that she can go to school or hold down a job and prefers to complain about how she cant succeed because she has no car to get a job or go to school. I dont have to worry about enabling her since she has not once asked me to help her since leaving and has maintained that she is happy with her choices. I am so frustrated! I do not yell at her, I just listen, shocked, each time I talk to her. She sounds great. She sounds happy. Then she starts telling me about what is going on in her life and I just sit on my end of the phone with my jaw on the ground wondering how she is still alive. I want to fly to MS and jerk her up and beat some sense into her. I dont yell because I am terrified that she wont take my calls anymore and then I wont know anything. I know I cant FIX her, so I just detach and go on like I dont have a child who is on her own, smoking, drinking, breaking the law, getting beat up by the men she dates, and doing drugs. I wish someone had an answer, I wish someone knew what to do. She is headed for jail and and doesn't know it, she thinks it will all just work out, and I dont know how to get through to her. Her father is wealthy and wants to pay to put her through college. He has no idea that she is headed to jail not school. I dont know whether to tell him about what is going on or not. She doesnt tell him anything. She has almost no clothing so she is stealing from Walmart and I am terrified that she is having sex for money. She is only 18, she was truly just a child when she left, a wayward child who does not make good choices because she has antisocial disorder and will not accept it and now she must pay for it. I have even considered having her declared incompetent and put into a state facility. If I thought it would help I would. I keep waiting on her to hit bottom. But she doesn't, and with all that she has been through she really should have hit bottom several times. She is determined to never look back, to just keep going forward, so she never learns from her mistakes or she learns to do a better job of not getting caught. She was a truly beautiful 15 year old and at 16 had 3 scholarship offers from colleges for soccer. She was an A/B student. How does this happen and what do you do.. just keep detaching ????? I just dont feel like that is the answer. I am her Mother and I should have some kind of influence shouldnt I? She looked to me for answers all of her life and then she just quit and now will not look to me for anything at all and I feel totally helpless.