help

[Jena]

wow she refuses to get up refuses to go to school. she came into our bed again last night but slept well.


she's laying on couch fully dressed and refuses to leave house, i've missed both trains i'm trying to stay calm but this happens almost all the time. i can't physically grab her because then she cries,

what do i do in situations like this? i get nervous i 'm late again for work getting her out door is traumatic.

jen

 

[4sumrzn]

Oh goodness, I'm sorry to hear that. I haven't come across this "yet", but suppose my first reaction would be to bribe in some way(food in my difficult child'c case). I know, probably not something to start doing....that was just my 1st thought. Hoping you find something that works soon!

 

[nvts]

Stop! Don't set your sights too high.

Step back and relax for a quick second.

Ask her what is making her from going to school. Is it a bully, is it nerves, is it fear that you won't come get her at the end of the day? Is it that she's doubtful that she can do the work?

Does she like the computer? Let her "buy" time on her favorite video game, computer time, baking time with mom. Does she like you to do her nails, hair, other girly stuff?

Try a reward promise to get her to go without the a.m. debate. Remind her of what the prize will be.

We have a store nearby called "5 Below". I went there, got a bunch of **** and set up a treasure box. No trouble getting out in the morning for 4 out of 5 days gets you in the treasure box.

Keep your cool!

Beth

 

[daralex]

Jen,
I wish I had something more productive to say, but wanted to send ((HUGS)) as I know you have so much on your plate. It's like just when things start to calm down the mess gets bigger. Is it only when YOU try to get her out of the house or would she be more willing if prodded by someone else (sister, boyfriend?) Otherwise the bribing in a sense seems like a good option. I like the treasue chest idea! Sounds like this is going on for a while so at least you know what you're doing now is not working for either one of you - the bonus is you get to try something new - sorry I don't have the answer to that one, but I'm sure someone on the board will have a better suggestion.
-Dara

 

[Jena]

thanks you guys. most mornings i can handle it today for some reason i was getting so nervous about my job again adn the trains i was missing i stayed calm infront of her. now i'm at work melting down. then i got a speech from my boss that i';m working too fast and screwing up and to slow down. i work so fast bc i'm not here enough so i push hard so that i can keep up even though i dont have enough time. so i missed something today that was very important. so yup i just wanna go down hallway into bathroom and cry like two year old. amazing right? 'im such a baby sometimes. i got mad at rin this morning too for first time god forgive me. i felt such rensentment towards her for a moment i'm embarrassed to admit this. i'm thinking in my mind i have to get to work to save up money to take you for more tests but you wont' let me go. round na dround we go. bad i know i've never felt that way before. i love her so i truly do. just if you wnat me to help you it's like ok you gotta let me help you. making money right now is that. so i bribed her with getting a hamster tonight.......LOL