My daughter is 20, 21 in the new year. She's just come back from university (having already gone late) an absolute wreck. The university has encouraged her to defer her first year on mental health grounds and come back next September. She wasn't looking after herself at all in halls and it was really frightening the university staff. I also think that the university is awful for mental health care. Honestly I think she's had a bit of an epiphany in the two months she's been away at uni and she's realised the world isn't ever going to be as great as she thought it would be and she now needs to make responsible decisions for her future and rather than moving forward she's just broken down. She has always had mental health issues, even when she was very little, and I think we've coddled her because she's always been very fragile. When she first had to come home a few weeks ago she was excited to take a "real gap year" learn a new language, work, travel and go back to uni as a mature student but now all she does is cry and hide in her room. To be fair I didn't think the student life was ever going to be for her as she's not very social and has always preferred the company of her family. From what I can gather she's desperately upset as she's realised that she's very immature for her age and doesn't know how to be a "proper adult". She talks a lot about age and how she's only getting older and more pathetic and she doesn't know what she wants to do with her life or what she is capable of doing given her mental health issues. If I'm being honest she does act like a sensitive teenager rather than an adult, probably as she was in and out of hospital throughout her teens and was only able to finish her level three qualifications this year. We're happy for her to spend the year staying a home getting better and start her degree next year. The university she got into is very high ranking and she is incredibly bright and able. Otherwise she could always drive herself to our local university which is not amazing but she'd definitely get in. I'm just aware the longer she spends doing nothing the more unwell she gets. I woke up this morning to find her curled up on the floor crying about growing old and dying. She's 20! Before university she was very excited for her birthday in January but now when I broach the topic she just starts crying. I'd encourage her to get a job and earn some money this year but I don't think she's up to it. I don't even think she's doing things she enjoys as she hasn't been leaving the house, playing video games or seeing any friends. She's very clingy when I get back from work and just wants to sit with me and watch TV. I'm worried about her mental state alone at home all day as my husband and I both work and her brother is in sixthform all day. To her credit she's been booking and attending mental health referral appointments but she's on a two month waiting list. How can I help her to move on? I'm frightened she'll decide she doesn't want to live anymore.