I've been thinking how can I detach from my son, how can I kick this kid out who abuses me, destroys my property but has major abandonment issues. Then I think of his friends who are forced to scrape by, live in crap-holes, eat crap-food and how he idolizes them. I wonder where are their mothers and fathers and why aren't they being blamed for their whole mess? Why are they all living apart from their parents but my son isn't? Is it because they have detached? But no, it is because they CAN'T help. In many cases it is because they themselves have issues and do not have resources to help. So by my thinking, I am tortured and abused by this thing because of what I have and what I've done with my life. I'm sick. I hate it and want it to stop. I wish I could go live under a bridge and tell him to f* off. I came from humble beginnings and worked my way to where I am now. For what? So I can sit and guard my nest egg from this monster that I've raised? I feel like a miser now, refusing to let go of any of my hoard. I am not a selfish person, but he is making me this way. I even deny my daughter things because I don't know the next demand/need that will come from my son. And if I say 'No more!' then what happens to him and how do I know the difference that my help would have made. What if I don't get him a lawyer for this felony charge and he ends up with it on his record? He will forever blame me and say that he was going to make things right if I had just helped him. I know this is messed up what I just wrote. But I needed to write it, to get it out. For you guys to tell me it's not real. It's all in his messed up drug riddled mind.