I think I might know wht difficult child is so tired!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by StressedM0mma, Dec 4, 2011.

  1. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    difficult child came in last night to tell me she couldn't sleep. ( I have always told her she could come and get me ) So I went and got in bed with her and rubbed her back and sang to her. She ended up falling asleep pretty quickly. But, she kept having muscle spasms/twitches throughout her entire body the entire time I was with her. I stayed in bed with her about an hour, and she did it the entire time. It would stop for a minute or two, but then pick back up. I had noticed it some before, but it was when she was asleep on the couch, and I thought it was from all of the noise that was down here. So, I am guessing that has to be part of it. I think I would be exhausted if my muscles were doing that all night and then I had to get up and function.
    I did a little reading, and I think it might be a Zoloft side effect. (Great!) I do not remember this happenning while she was on Celexa, and I KNOW we didn't have the tiredness problems.
    We have a p'doctor appointment. Tuesday and I definitely am bringing this up to her. I am actually really excited!! How sad is it when you are excited that you find something else wrong with your child.
    I told her I was very happy she came to get me even though it was 2 am. She said she tried to sleep, and couldn't so she got out of bed, played with her makeup for awhile, and tried again, and when she couldn't she came to get me. I was so proud of her. I told her she did everything we had talked about, and everything all of the books, and doctors. say to try. And, she came to get me. I know she is 14, and needs to learn to get to sleep on her own, but I have always told both girls they could come get me whenever they needed me, and I would never be upset.
    Sorry for the long post, but I am just soo excited for her, and us.
  2. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    That's great that she is comfortable coming to you. And it'll be even better if you have uncovered the reason she's so tired!
  3. buddy

    buddy New Member

    sounds very suspicious as a side effect if you noticed it with this medication only! great she came to you. There are sleep disorders too that cause muscle twitches and of course so can seizures. Still worth the sleep study I would think, but I wouldn't wait to change the medications... that seems too obvious now.

    I really pray this turns around for both of you. Has she tried things like melatonin for sleep? First of course make sure it wont interfere with her medications but I know tons of people who use this for their kids safely. (nothing is completely safe, so of course check it out.... I can't take it, makes me feel way too sleepy, even at a quarter of the tab. but most of my family can take one, and my sister (nurse) gives it to my depressed niece--age 15). Another friend gives it to one of her two kids with autism, he can't sleep without it.
  4. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    We did try melatonin. She had very vivid weird dreams on it, and would wake up at 3 and be wide awake. The same thing happened with me when I tried it.
  5. buddy

    buddy New Member

    really stinks doesn't it when the kids (or we) need something the most and it works for so many, but not us! Sorry for that... poor kid
  6. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I'm glad you noticed the muscle twitching. In addition to being a Zoloft side effect, don't be surprised if the dr prescribes calcium.
  7. EmJay

    EmJay New Member

    It says alot for her to be able to come to you in the middle of the night like that. Not only for you as a Mom but also for her as a teenager! Kudos to BOTH of you!!!!!
    As far as your concerns for your 14 yo learning how to fall asleep on her.... I will say this; just as when people tell me my 8 mo old needs to "learn" how to fall asleep on his own (wo cuddles or nursing), enjoy the cuddles! I would rather my child use ME as a "sleep prop" now then something else later (drugs).
    I think they find comfort in knowing someone is there with them. I don't think there is anything wrong with that!Most of the human population sleeps with someone else throughout their lifetime. Whether it be with a parent or their eventual spouse.

    Sorry for my rant...
  8. buddy

    buddy New Member

    EmJay, you are right, we get really hung up on sleeping with each other... and I do mean sleep. This is not how it used to be and certainly not how it is around the world. Of course we need to teach healthy boundaries etc. But (and I don't do this because I need lots of space and can't sleep with Q by me...though he is allowed if he is scared or upset, rare but i do it)... but, I have friends who do the family bed and every single one of their kids sleeps just fine independently now. They all weaned themselves when they were ready. I do know people who nurse longer too. Not to age 8, I haven't actually met anyone who does that, but I would not totally say it is not ok because I do believe in free choice and if you are not hurting a child, well? It would not be for me, but I could see changing my mind if my child had serious difficulties and was delayed or had nutritional difficulties or other reasons that this might be the one thing that helped. I think I would not be strong about my older child asking in public for it either... I would be too embarrassed. I know that is not the right answer, but I would wonder about people teasing my child too. OH by the way I am not assuming you do any of this, you just mentioned nursing and so it came to mind. I remember a story on TV about a woman who was nursing her 3 yr old at nights only. She had mentioned it to someone, she got her daughter taken away by cps and they said it was sexual. It took over a year to get visitations and start reunification. That is stupid overkill. Would not happen in most parts of the world.
  9. EmJay

    EmJay New Member

    Ok, I have to laugh! I think some of my posts are getting a little confusing bc I have an 8 YEAR old and an 8 MONTH old! lol... I nurse the 8 MONTH old; NOT the 8 YEAR old! lol
  10. buddy

    buddy New Member

    lol! I totally thought since we were discussing older kids you meant the older one!! I still stand by what I said though.... I am laughing so hard at myself, sorry.

    and you clearly did say the 8 month old, ... so dumb, sorry
  11. EmJay

    EmJay New Member

    It's all good! lol... I know I totally switched gears on that one! Sorry; that's MY ADHD showing through right there!

    On an older kid note; I was the First Time Mom who listened to everyone who told me he HAD to be an independent sleeper and shouldn't cosleep (if done properly it IS safe!). I spent the first three years of his life fighting him to sleep in his own bed. When we moved into this house we started allowing him into our bed but ONLY after he had given falling asleep in his own bed a good try. At 8 YEARS (lol) old he still comes in bed with us from time to time and when Daddy works nights. I enjoy having us all in the bed together when Hubbie is away! And we bought a King last year to fit all of us. I firmly believe some of his sleep issues have to do with all the trouble we had with him as an infant. He was SOOOOOO hard to settle down and put in bed. I often wonder "what if" I had let him cosleep from the beginning. Because I see a difference in his little brother "J" who I have allowed in my bed since the day we came home from the hospital and who also falls asleep ALOT gentler and easier than M did!
  12. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    With a psychiatrist appointment on Tues... the whole medications effect is the first issue to deal with.
    If switching medications doesn't solve it - or doesn't solve it completely - then move on to the sleep study...

    I don't stay in the room with our kids, but if they wake up and can't get back to sleep - I don't care if its 2 a.m., they can call me and I'll give them a good back rub and tuck them back in... It used to happen frequently; now, mostly if there's an obvious stressor (exam tomorrow... etc.)