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My difficult child is 8. He has lots of impulsivity problems, very hyperactive, talkative, disruptive. Does very well academically, but horribly behaviorally. Any suggestions? Please ask questions if u need to, I would like any suggestions possible.


I presume since you are asking about an IEP, that your difficult child is special education qualified.

If that is correct, what does the SD evaluation say?

Have you gotten an Independent Educational Evaluation? Who did the medical evaluation? I ask because you mention several medications and has an unusual diagnosis for a child.

Part of writing a good IEP includes not just the observation of behavior although they are important, but also an understanding of what might be driving the hyperactivity, etc.



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Yes, he does qualify for Special Education as he gets speech therapy at school and has an IEP for speech, but not for anything else. I have not pursued it untill now. He has had 2 medical evaluations, one by a psychiatrist and one by a child psychiatrist who he sees now.

I am still learning all this so please correct me if I am wrong on things.

What is an Independent Education Evaluation? Since I do not know what this is, I do not think we have had one.

I think the hyperactivity is partially driven by an insecurity. He wants to be liked, so he tries to be the center of attention. He does not know how to keep friends. He does not realize that he repels people with his actions instead of drawing them in. It also is just part of him. When we can get the rEEG to figure out which medication or medications he needs, things will most likely get better, but this could be another month or two. I want the IEP in place for when things get bad. I am tired of operating in crisis mode.


There is a loop-hole in the law that was lobbied by the S/L therapists: students can received S/L with a very abbreviated evaluation because the S/L lobby was afraid that if every child receiving (minor) S/L services had to have an expensive evaluation, it would not be done; there would be no clientele base; S/L therapists woudl lose their jobs.

This is a VERY outdated view but it is still enacted in the law. Most S/L therapists these days do not spend a lot of time correcting 6 year olds; "r's" which mostly will resolve without therapy by 7.5. Rather they work with students who have complex language disorders that interact with all sorts of other problems—who by the way need full and complete evaluations..

So I am GUESSING that your son had an abbreviated S/L evaluation. You provided good information, but you did not indicate what the SD evaluation. says. There must be one for your difficult child to receive SpEd services. Just because it exists, it does not mean it is helpful or complete.

I would ask for a reevaluation of ALL areas that might be impacting difficult child's “ability to benefit for education in the general education curriculum." The SD does not have to investigate everything but every SUSPECTED area. Your Parent Report, that you write (we recommend you do this--it has no basis in law) helps the SD know what to "suspect."

An Independent Evaluation is just what it sounds like: your SD has an financial interest to find nothing wrong with your difficult child so they do not have to provide expensive services. They would rather you continue down the medical route (which you must pay for by law.) Professionals of your choice who have no financial interest in the outcome do an IE.

There are two ways to get one:

Privately, which means you or hopefully your insurance company pays because it is a medically directed evaluation. that ideally is done at a major children's medical center that has a good psychiatric unit and especially a good pediatric neurologist or neuropsychologist.

If this is not an option, then AFTER the SD completes it's evaluation, you "disagree" with its conclusions and request an IE at public expense. The SD must do this UNLESS they take you to Due Process Hearing to show cause why their evaluation is indisputably legal, complete and so perfect that no other is needed. The burden on the SD is high to win this type of DPH. However, without knowing about your SD tendencies, I cannot predict if they would comply with your request for an IE or go to DP.

In an IE, you should be able to choose the evaluators but you may have to negotiate. You do NOT want any one who regularly evaluates for the SD. They are not likely to be independent.

All of the above is going to take time and I know you are asking for suggestions for an immediate IEP. However, in my opinion (and the opinion of Pete Wright "advocate-in-chief of the U.S" LOL--see ) that it is impossible to get traction with a SD without a very good IE--so that you and your experts know what is going on.

If I were you, I would write a Parent Report and ask to have difficult child evaluated before starting with a “band-aid" approach to the IEP. I would not like to be making suggestions to address "crises" without more information. What are the crises? Is the SD threatening removal of some sort?

Others can give you general suggestions regarding goals that are appropriate for IEPs for children with the problems you describe. With so many medications and the diagnosis, however, my guess is this is far more complex than “simple” ADHD, which actually is never all that simple, but some kids do have ONLY ADHD. It appears your child has some sort of mood disorder that makes the picture and the prognosis complicated. In the end, you will want to have your child qualified for more than S/L to get the legal protections that a label that addressed behavior affords.

Your child needs an advocate; according to law, you are the “natural” person to do that. The law makers forgot that the law as written is so complex that securing your child’s rights to a free, appropriate public education—and having it continue until h.s. graduation—is much more difficult than it looks on the surface.



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He has problems with articulation and something else too, but I do not remember. He did have a speech evaluation from an independent source before starting with the school. I think most of his speech problems are due to his behavioral problems, if you never slow down or pay attention, how can you speak well?

I want to have an Independent Education Evaluation, correct?

The crises are his behavior. No one has threatened to remove him from school, and we do not have many alternate learning environments, just the Special Education room which I do not think is right for him. I guess I need to realize these things are going to happen and they are not crises.

What he did this time is as follows: He was playing football at recess, and he and another boy tackled eachother. He got put on the wall as that is not allowed. As he and another child were walking into school he told the other child that he was going to bring a knife to school and stab the other boy in the heart. The other child reported this so Wed when difficult child went to school he was pulled into the office, searched (no knife thank god) and suspended. Now we have to have a risk evaluation by the school psychologist. I am tired of the school acting like he should be all better each fall. This will not go away, and we need to have things in place as soon as school starts.