If you have an ODD child, were you ODD as a child, too?

[Lucky1]

I am quite new to this board but am thankful there is an outlet.

My son is 13, almost 14 and I fully suspect he is ODD (though not professionally diagnosed, he has ALL the symptoms to a "T".) He is exhibiting so many characteristics that I can completely remember feeling in those teen years.

While growing up, I didn't have a very good relationship with my own mom, but I usually blamed that on the fact that my parents were divorcing and basically ignored me and my brother. Now I'm beginning to think that it was my own ODD all along

Currently, husband and I have been happily married for 21 years, and we have the difficult child (14) and another son, almost 7. All seems well and fine on the outside. Despite our 'normalness' difficult child is acting how I used to act - disrepectful and rude to my own parents.

Is this something you can recognize in yourself?? My saving grace is that I think I turned out quite alright so I feel that this may be the same outcome for difficult child.

Thanks for listening!

 

[BusynMember]

ODD, just for your information, is a diagnosis that almost never stands by itself. It is usually one component of a bigger disorder. That having been said, I think it's common that many people with defiant kids were also defiant since psychiatric and neurological problems are genetic. It makes sense that we've passed along some of our own genes to our kids.
I was very disrespectful at times and very loving at other times. I have, and had then, bipolar disorder, which certainly looked a lot like ODD. I'm stable on medication now.

 

[Fran]

Without a doubt I was oppositional but hardly in a difficult child category. I questioned everything. Defied my parents limits but in a survival method of oppositional behavior.
Ex)Parents wouldn't let me go to the Y to learn to swim. "I may drown". I filled the application and went without their knowledge. I learned to swim.

It goes on and on like that. I became all the more determined to do things my way as I realized that my parents suffered narrow vision.

I was oppositional but it served me well and honed a person who was self reliant at a young age and who made good choices. Just not my parent's choices but good choices.
I know I was a difficult 11 through 13yr old and very mouthy. I'm sure I gave my mother grey hair but other than trying cigarettes(and hating them) I didn't really engage in risky behavior.

Both my son's are very willful. Neither are inclined to follow peer pressure. It's a good thing. When being oppositional stops you from living a full life then it is a problem.

 

[DammitJanet]

Well...my son is definitely his mothers child! LOL. I have bipolar too but wasnt diagnosed until years later though I have no doubt I have had it all my life. I was definitely a rebellious teen. Im still a bit ODD! The main difference between me and my son is that I had enough self preservation sense that I kept myself out of major trouble. My kid on the hand just thinks he is invincible and no one will do anything to him.