My older daughter (9 yo), the one that I talked about on an earlier thread for stealing $3, the one that is getting evaluated for the ED label, acted out again what is apparently her new gig- stealing. Fortunately, she is not very good at so probably gets caught every time. This past Friday she took a childs book money envelope, scratched out their name on the envelope and wrote hers then took the money. RT new eactly where to start looking when he checked the envelope and it was empty. She told her RT that she gave $10 of the money to a boy in her class (That I thought she didn't even like) and the other $1 to a girl at Boys & Girls Club. Everyone involved readily fessed up when questioned. Apparently the boy in her class gave it to a 5th grade girl who said she still had it and would bring it in tomorrow. What the hell was my difficult child thinking??? Two identical things here in addition to the stealing: 1) It was Carnival Night at Boys & Girls Club aftercare for which they need money. She did not wind up with any from the theft though & my boyfriend brought them money b4 the carnival. 2) It was book club money that she stole. My dilemma is that we planned to take our first snow trip this weekend. **If** I tell my boyfriend (who is paying for the trip) what happened- she will NOT be going on this trip! Her resource teacher is benching her for the rest of the week and will have her make amends to the student. I am SO ANGRY with her right now and I just feel like pulling my hair out!!! It's just in one ear and out the other with her! She promises she is not going to steal again every time- but keeps doing it. I talked to my sister who was a habitual stealer as a child and says she did it for the attention and because she wanted something. How do I instill in my child that you don't take other peoples things? I feel dishonest not to share this with my boyfriend but know that her punishment will be severe (and most likely innafective) if I tell him. She is being disciplined at school. What if I just acted as if I didn't know and let them deal with it? I think if she is doing this at all for attention and I/We get upset with her and give her a bunch of attention and punishments- she wins! Meanwhile, I thought I might come up with something more creative to help her learn the lesson. My idea is to start giving her allowance and arrange for it to "disappear". I wonder how upset she would be if she thought someone was stealing from her? Or maybe her just having a few bucks in her pocket will deter her from stealing. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to handle this in a way that has been successful in stopping the behavior??? I need advice- PLEASE!