llQuestion about fighting on bus

[barboga]

My son, Jake, age almost 9, has been having trouble on the bus. A few weeks ago he and another kid got pulled off the bus after school in the parking lot because they were shoving each other.

Later that week, it happened again but Jake was able to control himself and just told the bus driver.

SO TODAY, Jake comes home and tells Dad and me that the bus driver is going to talk to us because he got into trouble again. No explaination about it other than he and this other kid just don't like each other. So now we wait for a call or note from the driver.

Jake has mentioned that a couple of the bigger kids on the bus trying bullying him. Not sure what to do about that - or even if it is true.

Jake did get his homework done tonight before 5:45! That is a big accomplishment. Got to go to scouts. He's only 1 requirement from getting his Bear badge. He's really proud of himself.

I don't know - I am reading a really good book about ADD and it talks about why he is so angry. It's almost like a two year old before they start talking. They can't express themselves to they resort to biting and hitting to get their point across. Jake can't seem to get his feelings heard, so he gets angry and then pushes / shoves.

I hate to admit that I'm counting the days down till school lets out.

Jake is a great student. All A's except for writing. He is in the top reading group (actually he reads about 3 grade levels ahead) and is in accelerated math too.

I just wish that his brain would mature a little faster with regards to his emotional health.

I could handle a C student any day vs. having the behavior stuff.

Isn't it sad that people can deal with academic failure easier than behavior failure.

Okay - so now I'm just feeling sorry for myself and a bit overwhelmed.

I'm working with spouse to get him to come up to speed with his understanding of ADD.

Thanks for listening.

BA

 

[kris]

<span style='font-family: Georgia'> <span style='font-size: 14pt'> <span style="color: #6600CC"> the school bus is nothing but a recipe for disaster.....even for kids who are not challenged.

do they have assigned seating on his bus? is he sitting near the kid he keeps having problems with? i'd recommend to the bus driver that the two of them be giving assigned seating far from each other. if they aren't near each other they are far less likely to engage in the undesirable behaviors. since husband is a SAHD can he drive difficult child to school a couple of days a week....help limit the contact.

assure the bus driver you want to work cooperatively with-him/her so this doesn't keep happening....& that you expect the other kid to be consequenced the same as your son.

kris </span> </span> </span>

 

[Wishing]

I drove my kid back and forth as I did not want my kid on the bus d/t fighting. I did not want him to be picked on and I did not want him to pick on others or to learn how to pick on others.
I did not want notes from the bus driver. I did not want mine to be discouraged. Also I think it is distracting for the bus driver to have kids not get along on the bus.Also I did not want mine to get a reputation as the one who is always being disciplined.That is wonderful he is doing so good in school and doing his homework-WAY TO GO!

 

[barboga]

He does great in the AM on the bus but the PM is the rough time.

I know that he has an assigned seat and that seems to work for him.

Found a great book: "You & Your A.D.D. Child" by Paul Warren.

Really describes what is going on with Jake.

I'm forcing my spouse to read it. He agrees that it is Jake after reading the first 10 pages.

It's funny as some of the stuff that drives us both insane seem to be the most ADD things.

Thanks for the support!

BA

 

[OpenWindow]

My difficult child has always had trouble on the bus. He had assigned seating on some. We drove him to school other years This year, he got kicked off the bus, but transportation has to be provided by the school especially if the reason he got kicked off is because of this disability. If he has an IEP, get it put in there that the bus is a problem and is related to his disability. They will have to come up with an alternative plan.

This year my difficult child rides the short bus with one other child who is wheelchair-bound and needs an aide. (I drive him to school but he takes this bus hoome) He's done great and loves riding this bus. No one makes fun of him, although that's one of my fears. It's a small town we're in and all the other kids know he's riding the short bus because he got in too much trouble on the regular bus.

The regular bus was just too much. Way too loud, way to unorganized. Kids bullying each other. My difficult child has very poor social skills and doesn't take being made fun of very well. It wasn't working at all.

Linda