I have decided that their are going to be some consequences for my mother's tirade beside not having me reach out to her for anything unless one of the kids really really wants me to. EVERY year in the past she has asked/begged/demanded that I make various treats for her home. At times she has paid for expensive ingredients if she wanted to send them to a relative. She likes for me to do it because I make them look pretty. This year we are taking NO food items that are prepared in our home. Her tirade about it is enough. She cannot have it both ways. So none of my secret recipe goodies. We got a tray of apples and cheese to take to share and we got a shrimp ring (precooked and frozen) as a gift for her. She really likes shrimp and I don't mind being thoughtful with it because I just cannot give anyone a gift that they really won't like if I see something they will. No cookies, cakes, candies, dips, hashbrown casserole, etc... It will be interesting to see the look on her face. Esp when my mother has fought weevils eight times in the last year and we have not had any type of infestation of critters because I have the supplies in airtight canisters or the fridge or freezer. We will spend some time there tomorrow. I will not say much, no point in it. certainly NO personal anything will be shared, at least in her earshot. Her reaction will be interesting, and I am more than a little tense, but it will be a relief when it is over because we won't see her again for a LONG time. I can't wait until it is over. I am ONLY going because the kids want to be there and she loves to use the holidays as an excuse to interrogate them if she can get them away from us. They don't deserve that.