Move over, Janet...

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by ThreeShadows, Sep 28, 2010.

  1. ThreeShadows

    ThreeShadows Quid me anxia?

    I've joined you in the loony bin.

    I'm almost ashamed to admit this, but we ASKED difficult child 1 to move back in. He is here on condition that he see a therapist and take it seriously. He went through his entire inheritance trying to make a living buying old cars and reselling them in Western Maine. He failed miserably, the entire region is depressed. The Army recruiters were targeting him, young men in that community are so desperate for work that they have no choice. We did not want to see our seriously depressed son end up in Afghanistan.

    Within four days of being here he has been rehired at his old mechanic job and will be making $19/hr once he meets flat rate. easy child and he have hated each other for years but they are now getting along really well. He has matured some and is showing her more respect, and she is reciprocating. They even watch tv together which is brand new behavior. At dinner he mentionned that the love of his life was about to deliver an other man's baby and easy child was the only one to show compassion. husband and I were both soooo relieved "she of the sexting episodes" is out of his life ! easy child told him how sorry she was for his pain. That's a huge WOW in this family!
  2. ScentofCedar

    ScentofCedar New Member

    It sounds like you did the right thing, ThreeShadows. difficult child was trying when he was on his own, and may have been defeated, not through his own irresponsibility, but by forces beyond his control. He has found work already, and seems to be happy to be back in the family.

    Wishing you all every success!


    P.S. Could you translate the phrase at the bottom of your posts, please?
  3. ThreeShadows

    ThreeShadows Quid me anxia?

    Thank you, SofC. I sent you a pm.
  4. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I sure hope the good news continues 3S. It would be wonderful if he really has matured.

  5. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Well, I shall move Good luck. Im attempting to get my entire crew out before the batch that is out wants to return back home...ugh.
  6. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    3S perhaps some maturity is creeping into the kids. And it can make an enormous change in relationships between sibs sometimes.

    husband's brother's kids had been at each other's throats almost from the very beginning. Huge jealousy issues on nieces part. It was so bad that brother in law and sister in law were always afraid to leave the 2 alone together for fear one may not survive. (not kidding)

    Once they were adults........niece had kids, nephew went off and came back from the gulf war........well POOF! You've never seen two sibs more close. And to look at how they treat each other now, you'd never dream of how horrid they treated each other as kids. Sometimes a little maturity can go a very long way.

    Of course we both know this could just be the "honeymoon" phase..........but hopefully it's that they're growing up.

    You had good reason for letting difficult child come home. And he has gotten a job right off. So far so good. And I hope it continues.

  7. katya02

    katya02 Solace

    Change can happen .... it sounds like your difficult child has been making an effort, trying hard, and heading along a good path. I would support that, too. I hope things continue to go well. :)
  8. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Isnt if funny how when kids are kids you think they will never get along? They can be bitter enemies, wanting to fight all the time as much as look at each other. Swear that they hate each other and will never speak again. Mine drove me batty! Cory and Jamie couldnt walk past each other without one or the other tripping each other. Jamie knew every button Cory had and loved to push them just to get a rise and get him in trouble.

    I always figured when they grew up they would never speak again.

    Now? They are all 3 thick as theives. They simply couldnt be closer to each other. Jamie's ideal world would be if he could afford to get a huge plot of land and have three houses on it so we could all live together. I dont know what Cory would do if anything happened to either of his brothers. Go crazy is my best bet.
  9. ThreeShadows

    ThreeShadows Quid me anxia?

    I probably have related this before, when we came back from Russia with easy child, difficult child 2 climbed up a tree and declared "I'm not coming down until THAT baby is gone!". Then he spent years attempting to co-parent her (major power struggle!). I remember him sitting on the step to the laundry room and declaring that life was perfect until SHE showed up. This is the kid who constantly pestered his twin until the poor boy blew up:clubbing:! All she caused was a shift in the dynamics of the sibling struggle, the boys stopped fighting each other and ganged up on her.

    Life has never been perfect in this family but God help any boy who hurts her, the difficult children will be cleaning their guns too.:devil: