It happened to me last night. Finally. Nothing really changed on the outside, but I felt the shift in the inside. I had a busy day working then husband calls and tells me he will be working late. I went for a long walk down by the creek. I heard the frogs and birds and watched the sun go down. I walked home and started to sweep my front porch. I had been in complete agony and grief, being around my 35 year old bipolar daughter takes a lot of patience, guts, and nerves of steel.. I went into deep meditation and thanked God for the lovely evening and peaceful walk. I always talk about 'giving it all to God' and I try but for some reason I hold on to some of it. Well last night I felt the intense agony, grief and pain lift. Just like that, I felt the Holy Ghost lift my spirit. I do know that my daughter's journey is HER journey and if she chooses to act bad that is on her, I can walk away lovingly. And that is what I have been doing. I have been walking away lovingly and solidly. I do not like the way my daughter acts around me or the way she treats me or how she messes my home up with her toxic actions and vibrations and how she tries to destroy my soul. I will have a 'Do not disturb sign on myself'. I got a message from her saying that we all need to go to family counseling. That is her way of trying to get her foot in the door to do more damage. We have gone through many sessions and many hours, I have spent close to one hundred thousand dollars, after insurance, on her behavior and by now at age 35 there should be great improvement but it is back to square one. My husband and I will not sit through the same old stuff over and over again. She will change when she can't take anymore of her own B.S. And sometimes I see the change but always back to square one. I have been making sure all of our financial dealings are on lockdown. I have been checking credits and other ties we have to our daughter and if I do find out she has forged our name you better believe it that I will press changes. I understand deeply that by not holding her accountable for her own behavior I am not helping her. I understand that the greatest gift I can give her as a parent is the gift of independence. Much of being a doormat is that I so desire a close relationship with her, she is my only child, but she is not acting like my child she is acting like a deviant trouble maker. I have to find a way to cushion the need for a daughter. I love my nieces but they don't fill the void I have for a connection to my own daughter. The deep sisterhood that I felt with my grandmother was such a great experience. I felt grounded and not alone, I felt deeply loved and deeply cared for, traits I show my daughter. But then I realize that my grandmother and I had a magical relationship and just because I want to feel that connection again does not mean I can have it with my daughter. I have tried it with my mother and in reality my mother just pisses me off with her rude ugly comments. I do have a wonderful loving husband but that is not the same as a deep connection with another female. I can only talk so much about sports and really I don't care so much about them. I have several sweet girlfriends. I don't have a bestfriend anymore, she found out her only son was gay and it has changed her in ways that are awful and she started verbally attacking me, she now is overweight and very bitter. I am sorry for her stress but we ALL are loaded down with stresses that we can't help but we can help how we handle them. Blessings to all.