I was getting too emotional and am letting H handle it. I am now in my room with reruns of Friends blasting so that I can't even try to hear what is being said. And trying not to throw up. And God forgive me, I am hating my son right now. How could I have given birth to such a jerk??? How could I have poured so much love into this man child for 19 years and have him spit nothing but disdain at me? He wants "HIS" CD and wants it now, transferred to his account. He thinks we are horrible people for cutting him off and now he wants nothing from us. He maintains that I hacked into his computer (totally untrue) to find his drug paraphernalia Amazon purchase and then told EVERYONE that he was a drug dealer. (Can I mention I hate my brother and sister in law right now too. My brother for telling my sister in law the extremely personal details of what I shared with him and her for blabbing it all to my sister in law and apparently to my nephews and niece as well - all of whom have apparently said something to difficult child about it) He hates the school he claims we chose for him (not true, we did suggest he pick a state school for financial reasons) I think he knows he is trapped there, he's stuck with his lease, his girlfriend is there now and his grades are likely too low to transfer elsewhere. I poured out my heart to this kid last week and practically begged him to take our financial help. I followed up by giving him one of those mushy blue mountain cards that stated that I believe in him and want to support him. He didn't even say "thanks for the card". He hasn't mentioned any of our past conversations and H decided it was time to revisit the subject (he leaves for school on Sun) and his only comment was that he wanted his CD transferred to his account in cash. I won't do it. I won't. I am not giving my drug using child $5300. He can sue me. I don't care. I am not going to pay him $5300 just so he might pretend to like me again. He won't show us his grades or verify his enrollment. Says its none of our business. I have been kidding myself and I feel really sick right now. He hates me - it's so apparently obvious that the niceness he's shown was an act because the moment the conversation went beyond banalities - his lip curled and he practically spat.