Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by JJJ, Oct 11, 2009.

  1. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Well, it was just one punch that was more emotionally hurtful than physically damaging.

    The younger 3 have been doing really well playing at the park next to our house. Some friends of Piglet's came over and asked all 3 of them to come play tag. There were about 20 kids in a massive game of tag all over the park (ages 8-14), It went great for over an hour. Then we get the call from Piglet. Eeyore punched Tigger in the stomach, completely unprovoked. I run out there (in my sick sweats cause I'm still not feeling well and husband's shoes cause they were near the door).

    After speaking with each of the kids, Piglet and Tigger went back to the game and I took Eeyore home. Essentially, the girls took one of the boy's hats and were playing keep away (teasing, the boy got it). Eeyore called me on his cell to tell on the girls and Tigger and Piglet were near him and Tigger kept talking so Eeyore punched him cause he wanted quiet. Tigger was upset but said that he was "always waiting for Eeyore to punch him, just like in my nightmare" (shades of PTSD from Kanga). I think it helped alot that Piglet immediately called me and said that Tigger didn't do anything and Eeyore just punched him. Having his way-cool sister stick up for him helped.

    Eeyore said that it's okay for him to hit people because people punch him. Of course, when questioned, he is talking about two years ago when Kanga lived here and tried to get the neighborhood boys to attack her sibs. :mad:

    Both boys just seem to expect abuse :( We did have a family visit with Kanga this weekend so that always brings those feelings to the forefront. Although I have to give her credit, she was appropriate during the visit although I may have missed something because Eeyore suddenly wanted the visit to end but that could have been his anxiety just overwhelming him.

    The progress is that Eeyore did walk home on his own power. No one needed a restraint. Tigger shook it off and went back to playing. And Piglet felt strong enough to speak up! (In the past, she would have become mute for the rest of the day.)
  2. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    At least there is some progress? Small comfort I am sure.

    I hope that all the kids can heal in the next few years to the point that they don't fight this way.
  3. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    Oh, their fights are very, very rarely physical. There was some pushing and shoving during the summer but this is the first actual "punch" that I can remember in at least a year.

    Eeyore is not doing well right now. His Aspergers is dominating his life. His thinking is totally black and white and school has become all shades of gray. Very frustrating for him, we are watching him closely for signs of depression. I'm thinking he may need a psychiatric hospital stay before the year is out :(
  4. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    I'm sorry to hear he's struggling. Can't the black & white thinking also be a sign of depression?