CCRidr2
Sheena-Warrior Momma
So this morning I went online and checked my sons lunch account like I do every day. He had more money in the account than he did yesterday. We don't keep cash in the house because it disappears, our difficult child steals it, so I know it didn't come from here.
I asked him about it and at first he said it must have been a mistake. I thought this might be true so I said I would call the school just to make sure they didn't credit the wrong account. I wasn't even thinking he might be lying, I just didn't want someone going without lunch or getting in trouble with parents because school got the account wrong.
Just before he walked out the door he says "I put money in my account". Just for reference, I keep a close eye on the account because he is not responsible and always gets extras that cost more money than he has in the account and then doesn't tell us he is in the hole until he has reached the limit on "charging" on an empty account. I asked him where he got money and he said he found it. "Where?" "I don't know here?" "You know Mom and Dad don't keep any money in the house, so I need you to tell me the truth" "I can't remember where I found it" "Was it yesterday?" and on like this very calmly.
Finally (I think) the truth came out, he "found" it on the bus but knew who's it was and kept it anyway and put it into his lunch account to hide the fact that he's been lying to me about his account again hoping that I hadn't checked. We tell him over and over no extras because we can't afford it, we tried sending his lunch thinking he was just really hungry but he would throw it in the trash and tell the lunch lady that he forgot his lunch/mom didn't make me a lunch (yeah right). I took 2 weeks for school to figure this out and call us (different SD, couldn't check balance online).
Do I punish this behavior and if so what is the best course of action. Actions = consequences don't click with him and past punishments roll off his back, he just doesn't care what we do or say. Or do I tell the school what happened, I have before when he stole money from a fundraiser for victims of the Tsunami the school had, and let the chips fall where they may?
I am so lost on what to do this time!! He's already had out of school suspension 2 times this year for stealing and in school suspension 1 time for destruction of school property and here he is back at it! I thought since it had been quiet for a few months (we moved, he's shy, I should have known better) that something had clicked ie: action=consequence. Obviously not. I am out of ideas this time, I usually know exactly how I am going to handle things. Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks!
Cyndi :crying:
I asked him about it and at first he said it must have been a mistake. I thought this might be true so I said I would call the school just to make sure they didn't credit the wrong account. I wasn't even thinking he might be lying, I just didn't want someone going without lunch or getting in trouble with parents because school got the account wrong.
Just before he walked out the door he says "I put money in my account". Just for reference, I keep a close eye on the account because he is not responsible and always gets extras that cost more money than he has in the account and then doesn't tell us he is in the hole until he has reached the limit on "charging" on an empty account. I asked him where he got money and he said he found it. "Where?" "I don't know here?" "You know Mom and Dad don't keep any money in the house, so I need you to tell me the truth" "I can't remember where I found it" "Was it yesterday?" and on like this very calmly.
Finally (I think) the truth came out, he "found" it on the bus but knew who's it was and kept it anyway and put it into his lunch account to hide the fact that he's been lying to me about his account again hoping that I hadn't checked. We tell him over and over no extras because we can't afford it, we tried sending his lunch thinking he was just really hungry but he would throw it in the trash and tell the lunch lady that he forgot his lunch/mom didn't make me a lunch (yeah right). I took 2 weeks for school to figure this out and call us (different SD, couldn't check balance online).
Do I punish this behavior and if so what is the best course of action. Actions = consequences don't click with him and past punishments roll off his back, he just doesn't care what we do or say. Or do I tell the school what happened, I have before when he stole money from a fundraiser for victims of the Tsunami the school had, and let the chips fall where they may?
I am so lost on what to do this time!! He's already had out of school suspension 2 times this year for stealing and in school suspension 1 time for destruction of school property and here he is back at it! I thought since it had been quiet for a few months (we moved, he's shy, I should have known better) that something had clicked ie: action=consequence. Obviously not. I am out of ideas this time, I usually know exactly how I am going to handle things. Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks!
Cyndi :crying:
