Question for Going North

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by SomewhereOutThere, Mar 21, 2018.

  1. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Obviously you don't need to answer and I apologize if you feel this crosses a boundary.

    Here it goes: If you never had kids, how did you end up on this forum? by the way I am so glad you DID come!! You add so much!
     
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2018
  2. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    I have a good friend, overseas now, who had a teen daughter with severe ODD.

    It was the first time I had ever seen behavior like that, and my friend sort of waved the behavior off with a flippant "Oh, ignore her. She's got Oppositional Defiant Disorder", while I stood there with my mouth hanging open. That sent me to an internet search (a loooong time ago), which directed me to this board. Somehow, my issues came up. Somehow, I was welcomed. (A short while before Fran took over, IIRC), and I've been here ever since, possibly due to the sort of "colorful" lifestyle I've lived.
     
  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Ah, thank you!!!

    Wow you were here longer than me....lol.

    I am glad you came. On a personal note, it is nice to chat with someone who knows first hand both where I grew up and where I live now and who loves her pets as much as I love mine.

    The board has changed sooooo much. It used to be primarily little kids who brought us here. Well, thanks again for sharing.
     
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2018
  4. Dory

    Dory Member

    Hi ,wonderful people,
    I actually came upon this site trying to find an easy going forum for me.
    I am trying but it is very difficult for me to get around.
    Such a beautiful sight for people to come across and connect.
    Thankyou
     
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  5. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am glad you are here GN, because in many ways you opened my eyes and helped me see that my son and father were not the only 2 in the family with Aspergers. Or whatever you want to call it now. You helped me understand that all the confusion I felt as a kid were just my own autism popping up in a time when it was diagnosed unless you were profoundly impacted by it. At least you were not in my neighborhood!
     
  6. Old-hand

    Old-hand Active Member

    I am so happy all of you came onboard this forum!

    Going North. I just know you would have made for one super, duper excellent mom!
     
  7. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    I don't know about that. I do know that my husband would've made an excellent father.
     
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  8. Old-hand

    Old-hand Active Member

    I really do, I think you would have been firm, but fair, providing them with good solid direction.
     
  9. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    Thank you Old-hand and Copabanana. I think I would've been much like my mother. Fine with her kids and grandkids (better with her grands), but other peoples' kids gave her hives.

    husband, however, was a kid magnet. Friends and neighbors used to hand him fussing babies and toddlers and he could jolly them into giggles or soothe them to sleep within minutes.

    Me? I just tend to treat them like little people, with an awareness of their developmental level, foibles and quirks, and try to work with what's going on in their heads. My usual gig is to find something to fascinate them with, which even works with infants. Those little brains are like sponges!
     
  10. Old-hand

    Old-hand Active Member

    Some fathers/men are great with kids. I happened to have found one that stayed well clear of all things baby, until the kids got older. When he held one of the kids (which was rare and only when directed by me), you could see the anguish in him. Just wasn't for husband.

    Heck, I couldn't even get husband to bring me in an emergency baby washcloth when I had a kid hoisted by their ankles at change-time. LOL!
     
  11. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I don't think men can get away with that today!!

    My first husband would do diapers, changing, feeding etc. But after the kids get older, he grew bored. Didn't even go to their sports. He hated sport's. His lack of interest in the kids made me and his kids not happy with him.

    This husband I am with now is Father of the Year and is sought out for activities even by adult daughter. He helped really make our family a lot of fun. He has always been extremely engaged in every facet of their lives. His kids adore him. I do too!
     
  12. Old-hand

    Old-hand Active Member

    When the kids got older and more independent, husband climbed out of his shell. He took them everywhere, attended sports games, school functions, and all sorts of other things.

    Just wish he would have been on the same page when it came to pitching in when the kids were little. Diapers, bottles, discipline/punishment... that all fell on me, and being the stay-at-home that I was, I was OK with it, but... always nice to have extra help when you're raising little ones.