Rigid, stuck thinking

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by flutterbee, Nov 5, 2008.

  1. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    I'm really starting to see more and more of this with Wynter - especially with school. The I can'Tourette's Syndrome and I have no control over it. I don't think they're just excuses to get out of whatever it is she's supposed to do. I think she really can't - or rather, doesn't know how. She gets stuck, she shuts down and that's all she wrote. Distraction and redirection very rarely works. She shuts down almost immediately.

    And I don't know how to help her with this. She's never been diagnosis'd on the spectrum, but she definitely has a lot of traits. How do I get specific help with this - specific therapy? Without an Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) diagnosis, it seems to be incredibly hard to get the intensive therapy I really believe she needs in those areas.

    I do think that CBT could be helpful, but I don't think it's going to do the whole trick, Know what I mean??
  2. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    Ok. So, I'm calling our local MR/daughter tomorrow and asking for direction. I did the childbrain assessment again and she scored 105 - moderate Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD). I've done it a few times before and she's consistently scored moderate Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD), but the neuropsychologist didn't think she really met it. I also read from the MR/daughter site that any child in Ohio on medicaid is entitled to periodic screenings, including developmental if the signs are there.

    I don't know what it was...but something tonight just really clicked: that this is different. I've always said she has traits, but things have really been much more noticeable lately.

    I feel so sad and horrible that if it turns out she is on the spectrum that it took so long to get the diagnosis and proper services. I feel so sad and horrible that until tonight it really didn't click with me that this is just so different. I know I don't have any answers yet, but I guess it just really clicked with me that what I've been focusing on all along seems so wrong.

    So, I will call the MR/daughter in the morning and hopefully get to talk to someone who can guide me in the right direction and Wynter has a GP appointment later in the afternoon and I can talk to her, too.
  3. 'Chelle

    'Chelle Active Member

    Well, my difficult child was 11 before we got his diagnosis, so you're not that much longer than we were. I hope you can get her in somewhere with a specialist in developmental disorders and have her assessed. I think its not uncommon for high functioning Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)/Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) kids to not get diagnosis'd early.

    This rigid thinking is one that I struggle with sometimes with my difficult child. He gets something in is mind, and that's it. For example his karate. He got to the level where he next tested for his brown belt, which is actually a big step and they get much more strict on getting it right before they award it. He didn't pass the first time, and got so stuck on how he would never get it and wasn't improving he couldn't be convinced otherwise. I think it's one reason he quit, as I started prodding him to try again and he quit rather than actually test. If he gets that "I can't" thought in his head, it's very hard to get him to think otherwise, though if he does and actually tries and succeeds he's very proud of himself. I'm still at a loss as to how to change his thinking, but I do see improvement as he gets older.
    Last edited: Nov 6, 2008
  4. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    You might want to do some research on how girls manifest Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)'s differently than boys. There really is a substantial difference, one point being that girls are better at "faking it" with emotions and social behavior, esp at younger ages. I have NO doubt that if I were evaluation'd they would diagnosis me with an Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). I can actually REMEMBER watching my same age peers do things and wondering "why?" bc some of it seemed so dumb. Some of it still does. I watched the other kids, esp girls, and talked to a VERY FEW specific friends about certain behaviors, then mimicked them. Some years the effort to mimic the other kids was just too much and led to things like my refusing to speak to ANYONE for over 8 months of a school year. Anyone included the teachers, nuns, and the parish priest, but no one called my parents because my grades were OK and so was my "charge's" grades. (The "cahrge" was the less than intelligent child who sat next to me and who's work I was expected to do along with my own. That way he passed and it kept me busy as I was always done with my work early. The year I didn't talk I had TWO of these people to "take care of" and it really hacked me off. It was a major reason I wouldn't talk to the adults at school.) My parents had no idea I had stopped talking because I talked nonstop at home (guess we know where my kids got it, HUH?)

    Anyway, I am sorry she is having the rigid thinking. It is hard on her and on you. I think having her evaluated again is a very good idea. Don't let her age be the reason anyone tells you she "can't" have an Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). Some people are not diagnosis'd until older because either signs were few when younger, or because they hid it really well. Girls esp fall into that category.

    I hope you can get help so she can move beyond the stuck thinking.
  5. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    I contacted MR/daughter and the lady I spoke with was very helpful. Supposedly we need to have a diagnosis, but they will send out an eligibility consultant who can also do an evaluation and they come to the house. I need to get together all the paperwork I have and most of it I need to regather from the SD and neuropsychologist. With everyone taking care of my house and helping me move, a lot of it has been 'misplaced'. She needs to have trouble functioning in at least 3 areas. She read them off to me and Wynter definitely has issues in 3 of the areas she named - self direction, independence and impact with school.

    We have also reconvened the IEP meeting for 11/18.

    So, this is a start. I'm hopeful that we can start down the road to getting the right services.

    We were at the vet today and her son is on the spectrum - very high functioning. The SpEd teacher at the school told her she has noticed a difference in behavior in spectrum kids in relation to the barometric pressure. That every spectrum kid that she deals with had trouble last week with the pressure was changing. I found that interesting. Something worth tracking, anyway, to see if there is a correlation.