Star*
call 911........call 911
Hi all,
It seems lately we've had quite an increase in welcoming newbies. I have long been thankful for the security and comfort that I've found here. It truly has been a soft place to land. I sadly and maybe selfishly find security in the numbers of people who post here. It almost seems that the more people who come on board, the more normal I feel about myself as a parent or person. I find comfort in the responses that are posted whether they are to my own post or someone else who has a similar problem. I try not to lurk too much on posts, and offer advice, a shoulder or at least a "here's a hug" to let the poster know I was there and they were in my thoughts at that time.
Most of you don't know me. You don't know my son. I'm semi-guarded about telling the story of our tragic beginning for varied reasons. Mostly now because we've been in counseling for behavior therapy for so long, I'm just tired of telling it. Some days I'm almost frightened that if I even speak about some things it will open the door so-to-speak, so I keep the door shut and try to survive. Someday maybe I'll write the book I keep telling myself I'm going to write and that will offset the costs of raising a child on my own without any welfare, or child support.
What I do want to bring to the table tonight from years of life experience for parents who are struggling with difficult child's is a simple message. It's fantastic that you found us, that you are arming yourself with knowledge to be a better advocate for your child(ren), it is monumental that you are educating yourself on the types of therapy, medicines, behavior modules, diets, parenting techniques, and counseling for them. BUT.......don't ever think that taking time each day for yourself is a selfish thing. Regardless of how simple it seems. Even just shutting the door on a bathroom for 15 minutes and letting the world escape you...do it. Don't forget to take care of yourself first. THis is not an airplane, the mask isn't going to fall down for you to get oxygen before you help your child. You are just going to have to seek out self-preservation activities and remember you have to come first.
Remember : If Momma ain't happy? Ain't no body going to be happy.....holds more merit than you think when it comes to living in a household with a difficult child. And if you are 'da Momma...and you ain't happy? How do you think you can possibly be a good parent? Deep though. You can't be good to yourself...it's unlikely you can be great for someone else or set a good example.
It's not SELFISH parent. IT IS SURVIVAL Parent. Work it in somewhere. You won't regret it. Neither will your kids.
Hugs and Thoughts...
Star
It seems lately we've had quite an increase in welcoming newbies. I have long been thankful for the security and comfort that I've found here. It truly has been a soft place to land. I sadly and maybe selfishly find security in the numbers of people who post here. It almost seems that the more people who come on board, the more normal I feel about myself as a parent or person. I find comfort in the responses that are posted whether they are to my own post or someone else who has a similar problem. I try not to lurk too much on posts, and offer advice, a shoulder or at least a "here's a hug" to let the poster know I was there and they were in my thoughts at that time.
Most of you don't know me. You don't know my son. I'm semi-guarded about telling the story of our tragic beginning for varied reasons. Mostly now because we've been in counseling for behavior therapy for so long, I'm just tired of telling it. Some days I'm almost frightened that if I even speak about some things it will open the door so-to-speak, so I keep the door shut and try to survive. Someday maybe I'll write the book I keep telling myself I'm going to write and that will offset the costs of raising a child on my own without any welfare, or child support.
What I do want to bring to the table tonight from years of life experience for parents who are struggling with difficult child's is a simple message. It's fantastic that you found us, that you are arming yourself with knowledge to be a better advocate for your child(ren), it is monumental that you are educating yourself on the types of therapy, medicines, behavior modules, diets, parenting techniques, and counseling for them. BUT.......don't ever think that taking time each day for yourself is a selfish thing. Regardless of how simple it seems. Even just shutting the door on a bathroom for 15 minutes and letting the world escape you...do it. Don't forget to take care of yourself first. THis is not an airplane, the mask isn't going to fall down for you to get oxygen before you help your child. You are just going to have to seek out self-preservation activities and remember you have to come first.
Remember : If Momma ain't happy? Ain't no body going to be happy.....holds more merit than you think when it comes to living in a household with a difficult child. And if you are 'da Momma...and you ain't happy? How do you think you can possibly be a good parent? Deep though. You can't be good to yourself...it's unlikely you can be great for someone else or set a good example.
It's not SELFISH parent. IT IS SURVIVAL Parent. Work it in somewhere. You won't regret it. Neither will your kids.
Hugs and Thoughts...
Star
