Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Wiped Out, Apr 19, 2010.

  1. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    What a long day...

    After school we had a meeting with-easy child/difficult child's guidance counselor. She is currently failing four classes and has a "C" in two classes. She just isn't doing any hw at all right now. She has many excuses for her hw not being in. Bottom line is she now knows what she needs to do to get out of this hole (mostly I like what the counselor said about leaving the hole behind). Time will tell if she will really turn things around. She has a lot of support so I hope she starts making some wise choices.

    She is also going to be looking at an alternative hs for next year.

    Onto difficult child...

    We had a good visit with him yesterday and a nice pass today (took him to play basketball and for ice cream). They are starting to get pressure from the insurance company to release him. Every time I talk to the sw at the hospital she says difficult child seems to be doing very well. However, I don't tend to hear the same exact thing but maybe it is in the interpretation. Today he kicked and shoved a nurse. The nurse telling me said she thought it was because he was tired. in my opinion, not a good enough reason. I worry about how he will be at home and school if he is struggling in the psychiatric hospital. Looks like he might be released on Wednesday. Just hoping he is ready.

    I can feel my stress level rising!
  2. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Oh dear.
    If he shoved a nurse, he's not ready yet ... but tell that to the ins company.

    So sorry about easy child/difficult child's schoolwork. been there done that, unfortunately. You're in good company. The counselor sounds pretty level headed, though.

  3. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    I agree with you about difficult child, how will he be at home if he is struggling there? That is very scarey. Health insurance companies are a pain, a necessary evil if you will.

    As for easy child? She knows what she needs to do, now is the time to buck up and do it. You cannot do it for her, hopefully she will toe the line.

    Hugs, Sounds like you are all in so much turmoil right now.
  4. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    Again, they should only be allowed to 'go' one at a time. I hope easy child makes good choices and that difficult child does better.

  5. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    I like that concept of "leaving the hole behind!" That's more or less where I left many of difficult child 1's missed assignments from the first part of this quarter. We focused on getting the bigger ones from the end of the quarter in and let the rest go. The new quarter started today -- and he's not off to a very good start having missed 1/2 of Thursday, all of Friday and today due to IBS problems. :(

    I am just astounded that the psychiatric hospital could even suggest he's doing o.k. after getting violent with the nurse. No way is he ready to go home yet. And no wonder your stress level is creeping back up!
  6. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    So what do they tell you about the nurse situation? Have you met with-them since then?
  7. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Thank you everyone. When I got to the psychiatric hospital today there were four police cars there. Thank goodness it wasn't for difficult child! difficult child and I had a nice visit. He was appropriate almost the entire time and the one time he wasn't he corrected it. Sounds like he had a rough day though before I got there.

    I did talk to the psychiatrist today and he is going to try to get them to approve through Friday (meaning we would pick him up Friday after school). Right now he is only approved through Wednesday. Thursday I have an appointment to meet with this new place that might be able to provide some services for difficult child. Keep your fingers crossed that they have some services that will be beneficial for difficult child. Also cross your fingers they will keep him in the phsop til Friday. I just don't think he is ready yet to be out yet.
  8. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member


    sorry. I hope he can stay till Friday. It would probably be better if, rather than just coming home and going back to "normal" with school and all, that he had some kind of program like day treatment or something to go to. Some program where he getting help while going through the daily routine. I hope you are able to find something. Given he was physically abusive to a staff member just days ago, I'm not sure this stay has done much but give the family respite.

    Tough news with easy child/difficult child. How does she feel about changing schools her senior year? You would think this would be disastrous for her and she would buckle down and do everything she could to stay with her friends. But, if she is truly hovering on the difficult child status, typical reasoning is not there. Hope her counselor can make some headway with her.

    I bet you were scared pulling up and seeing all those police cars! I remember, when difficult child was in 6th grade, I went to pick him up for school at the normal time in the afternoon. When I got there, there were three police cars at school and the school was on lockdown - All I could think was, "geeze, don't let this be difficult child!!" Isn't that sad that we thing the worse first...........

  9. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Pressure from the insurance company does NOT mean they have to release him. I would think kicking & shoving an authority figure constitutes keeping him there. Is this a short term program? Does not seem like much progress has been made.
  10. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    If It's an acute psychiatric hospital I can see them releasing him now; what I can't see is why they aren't pursuing more intensive services or placement for him upon release. If they mentioned that a Residential Treatment Center (RTC) might need to be considered, are they pursuing that and recommending one or some other intensive outpatient care? I had been told by a couple of people that if the psychiatric hospital released difficult child too soon and without an adequate plan in place, to take him right back to the ER or admittance at the first sign of instability. After a couple of times of that, they will generally look a little harder at what needs to be done. It doesn't sound like even two more days will be enough to think your son can maintain stability upon returning home.
  11. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Chiming in late, but I hope they at least approve Friday. One bad day in his placement? I could maybe see that sliding by...but if he had a rough day yesterday before you got there, too....what do they think will happen in the big wide world. I'm sorry. Preaching to the choir, I know.

    Hope your meeting for services goes well, at least. And hopefully someone at the psychiatric hospital will hear that Friday, AFTER that meeting, would be a much better time to release him.

    Hugs for you re: easy child, too. You don't need that right now, too!