speech evaluation after a hard weekend

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Ktllc, Feb 6, 2012.

  1. Ktllc

    Ktllc New Member

    V had a speech evaluation today, the therapist came to our house and we talked a bit before starting the evaluation itself.
    I ended up crying in front of him!! I just could not hold the tears back when I was describing the social issues: how V called a classmate a "friend" when in fact he was being bullied on a daily basis, how he was so happy at soccer to just be running with the group although he was not following the game at all and still had no clue he has to use his feet and not his hands, etc... I just ended wiping my tears and begged the therapist to not say "everything is fine, let's wait and see". The therapist discritely took his glasses off and wiped his eyes.
    Yep, I made him cry!!! Now, I'm not sure: should I cry or laugh about it??
    The Speech Language Pathologist (SLP) did his evaluation and V qualifies for services on the expressive part: 14 percentile. Receptive was good: 40 percentile.
    I questioned on how the evaluation could show any social communication issues, he said that it could not show us that but V qualifies and now we can work on whatever we want.
    He also said that it will be a little tricky to get the social part since it is an agency that comes to the home. He'll see if he is allowed to go to V's school in order to get a better understanding of the social part.
    But I think he understands the issue and asked me if it was ok to get me really involved in the therapy sessions in order to add some social complexity. Of Course!!
    I feel like an emotional roller coaster... still trying to come to terms with V's issues. That comes after a terrible weekend, some of the worst tantrums ever, and tomorrow: surgery.
    Oh, and I met with behaviral therapist. I have mixed feelings about her. I don't think she grasps V's complexity. She has a simple view on things. I was describing one of the latest issue that led to a tantrum:
    - What do you want for breakfast: oatmeal or grits?
    - Eggs.
    - No, I don't feel like cooking. What do you want : oatmeal or grits? Those are your 2 choices.
    - Grits.
    -Ok. (take the grits out)
    - No, I want oatmeal.
    - Ok... (grits back in, oatmeal out)
    - No, no, I want grits.
    - Grrrr, ok! (oatmeal in, grits out)
    That is of course JUST the start, and therapist goes "Oh, my goodness!!"
    I look at her and explained that it was just the prelimenary part. Not the issue.
    The issue was when he ate 2 spoons of grits, I asked him to please finish his bowl otherwise he'll be hungry in 15 minutes and V threw a HUGE tantrum (screaming, crying, trying to vomit, stomping, yelling at me, etc...). I ended up sending him to his room and he eventually calmed down. And had no clue why he had to say sorry.
    Therapist thought that it was all a control issue. I had to explain that V has NO control over those behaviors. He was not being defiant: he cannot choose, ever. ANY choice is like a torture to him. But deciding for him is not acceptable either.
    I'm sorry if I wrote a book... I'm trying to help V but we seem to be running out of options, unless we end up getting an Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) diagnosis.
  2. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    I am so glad the speech therapist seems to definitely "get" it. Sometimes tears speak louder than words. It makes what you're saying REAL. Good for you!! As for the behavior therapist, I would be leery too. If she's already talking manipulation, THAT is a huge red flag. If that continues, you are better off without any help than to allow womeone with that mentality to make things worse, and she WILL make things worse. Proceed with caution.
  3. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    We found that each "professional" that we could get on-side, added a TON of weight to our arguments. Occupational Therapist (OT), Speech Language Pathologist (SLP)... it doesn't have to be psychiatrists. Even teachers count (if they are on-side). SO... the speech therapist "getting it" is a major first step. Once that therapy has been going on for a while and he can form his own "professional opinion", he may be able to write an interim report for you that includes comments like "perhaps it would be good to pursue testing for something along the lines of (bla bla bla)..."... which gets added to your stack of documents for the next evaluation round...
  4. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Oh so glad someone heard you. Good job making your case my friend... Really great. You have a lot on your plate right now with worry for both of the kids so enjoy this step! Hugs to the kids too...
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Get what you can (services) and keep looking for a professional who will finally give you the diagnosis. I'm not a doctor (and don't play one here), but I'd be shocked if he isn't dxd. with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) when he gets a bit older. That diagnosis. often is not given until the child is older, even when it is obvious, such as with my own son (unless, of course, it's not Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) but a mimicker...I believe there are a few). Sonic was not diagnosed until age 11, yet we managed to get him Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) interventions by just having psychologists put down that he needed Occupational Therapist (OT), PT and social skills classes. The diagnosis at age 11 made it easier to get "older kid" and adult services, which is important, but you aren't there yet.

    ((((Hugz)))) Hang in there. Baby steps.