The end of the Honeymoon

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by STRESSEDTOMAX, Nov 1, 2011.



    Hi Everyone -

    I wanted to post yesterday but didn't have a chance. difficult child was put on 10mg Prozac about 6 weeks ago. At first, it seemed like a miracle drug. We had no real meltdowns until two nights ago. He was being much less defiant and was much more able to calm himself down at home and in school. Now, it seems to be changing. When difficult child goes to bed, I stay in the room while he falls asleep because it calms his anxiety. That has been working PERFECTLY for the last two months. He's up at 6:30 so he usually falls right asleep. Anyway, he is obsessed with Halloween so Sunday night he couldn't fall asleep. This seemed to set things in motion. He asked me if he could stay up till morning? I told him I'd watch some tv with him for a little while till he got tired or read him a book or he could play video games for a bit. NOTHING worked. He was saying he didn't want to go to school. Finally, he spoke to his older brother, calmed down, and fell asleep with me in bed next to him.

    Yesterday, he was suspended mid-day. He was admittedly kicking things in his classroom, then standing on the stalls in the bathroom refusing to come down, then taken to the principal's office and in her presence was kicking her desk and broke a pencil. I went and got him. It was obvious to me that the Vice Principal assumed that I was taking Trick or Treating away from him. Believe me, I totally understood her point but he looks forward to this day all year. I was actually concerned, though, that suspension means nothing to him because there are never any real consequences at home. I was actually ready to keep him home but my husband felt like he's been doing so well and we shouldn't take it from him. What really bothers me is that I feel as if we are being held hostage to his meltdowns. My husband's biggest fear was what difficult children reaction would be to not being able to go out.

    So...we went. First problem was how the costume felt. Fixed that. Then he was upset because a boy in the neighborhood was pointing a bb gun at him. Then a boy he considers a friend called him an idiot and a whiner. Last, he frieked out because his inflatable costume started to deflate and he wanted me to walk all the way home and get him another costume. This was when trick or treating was almost over and I refused to do it. My older son's girlfriend helped redirect him and we got through it. Bedtime started good but ended as a nightmare. He wanted me to have lunch with him in school and I said I couldn't because I was working...maybe dad could go. No..not good enough. I said we'll plan it for next week...not good enough. He became totally out of control on this and it went downhill from there. Then my husband got involved with his rage and the screaming was crazy.

    So far today, nothing from the school. I have a call in to psychiatric about upping the Prozac, which I did on my own this morning anyway. Have neuropsychologist appointment next Monday. I am just totally drained. Everything gets affected, especially my feelings towards my husband. Like I said before, the minute he doesn't get something he really wants there's an explosion and I refuse to give him everything he wants. sorry for the length of this...thanks if you made it all the way
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    As one who has taken more psychiatric medications than most our kids, I think it's the Prozac. Unfortunately, there is often a fast, good effect, but the drug keeps accumulating in your system and there is no way to judge how it is going to be in the long run except to wait and see. Since you take it, it has obviously worked for you, but that is not always how it goes.

    I took Prozac. At first I felt so good that everything made me giggle. I was in a great mood, although it did make me sleepy (it's not supposed to) and I often had trouble staying awake at work. I didn't care. All I cared is that the depression was gone. Two months later it pooped out as if it had never made me feel better. Shortly thereafter I wa in a horrible funk that was as bad or worse than before I'd started it. My psychiatrist upped the dose from 20 mgs. to 40 mgs. That even made me feel worse and Prozac never worked again for me. This sudden lack of working is something I call "pooping out." It is common with all antidepressants, although not all antidepressants will poop out on a particular person. There is no way to know, other than to try it for an extended period of time, if any particular medication will work for the long term. Most of the medications I took either didn't work well enough or pooped out in some way. I was lucky to finally find medications that have worked for almost twenty years. However, the medications game is a big game of guessing.

    I would say the Prozac, more than anything else, is probably the cause of the behavior. It either is no longer working or it has made him a little agitated and manicky, which any antidepressant can do. I try to caution parents not to get too excited when a medication works too fast. Actually, they are not supposed to kick in for 4-6 weeks. An early good response for an antidepressant often is not a good thing.

    Keep us posted and tell us what you decided to do. I'd definitely talk about this to psychiatrist.
  3. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    Holidays are hard. Especially holidays they have been looking forward to all year long. Yesterday difficult child 1 was trying so hard to be good. His sister still got hit with a flying shoe. It might not have anything to do with the medication. It could be the excitement. The not being able to transition from what they have been planning all year long to reality. The lack of sleep from excitement. It might take a few days to wind down or he might be o.k. today.

    Maybe a medication to help get through exciting hard times?


    Just saw the other post. She has more experience with medications than I do.
  4. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    I totally agree it is the Prozac. We JUST went through this with difficult child 1. It was a miracle cure at first but then it started disrupting his sleep within just a few weeks. He'd fall asleep okay but wake up in the middle of the night for about 2 hours because he couldn't get back to sleep. Then the sudden aggression started. He developed a hair trigger and he would react to all frustration with physical aggression, usually toward objects. It finally escalated to very physical aggression toward people culminating in pulling a knife. Because a weapon was involved, cops were called (not by me) and they wanted to send him to juvie. I explained that it was the medication so they took him to the hospital where he was sent to a psychiatric hospital on a 72 hour hold. I informed staff that I wanted the Prozac stopped. That was a week ago and I have my son back. There is no aggression AT ALL and his frustration tolerance is phenominal. They put him on a very small dose of Tenex until the Prozac is out of his system to help with the impulsivity the Prozac is causing.

    See if they will do a 1 week drug holiday from the Prozac and see if you notice a difference. That will be the only way you will really be able to tell if it is the Prozac.

    Good luck and {{{{(((HUGS)))}}}} from someone who just went through this.
  5. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I am so sorry you have gone through this. Yes it can be the medications or the excitement or both. Only way to tell is time or trial and error. I would be leery of upping a medication without the doctor's approval though with a child.


    I know...I shouldn't have upped it. It's just that his psychiatric has mentioned upping it before. It's weird...Prozac was the first anti-depressant I ever went on and I swear it had almost immediate effects. I've been on others, now back to Prozac. I'll have to talk to the doctor about this. I am sooo sad that my son has to be on any medications at all. What do you all think about my letting him go trick or treating? Would you have taken it away?
  7. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    I think that's a tough one. One the one hand you want to take away trick or treating because his behavior was not was expected. On the other hand, if it was the medications that were causing his behavioral problems, is it really fair to take it away from him? This is one of those times where you could say that it really wasn't his fault. I might have done what you did and let him go, but I probalby would have done it just so that I would not have to deal with the meltdown not taking him would have caused. I know, it's the coward's way out, but sometimes I just don't have the strength to fight with him.
  8. buddy

    buddy New Member

    I'm sorry it was so rough. This is exactly what was throwing my difficult child off the past few days, why I got punched, and why he had to leave family therapy at psychiatric hospital this morning. Just so fixated on halloween and the candy being exactly the same as last year. I get not wanting to take it away after the suspension because it does make it highly likely you will have the blow up anyway and you try to prevent it even though you know at some point there may be something that will set him off. As far as upping the Prozac, are you sure this is not situaitonal? Just asking, you know your kid. I just write off holiday/special event behaviors when it comes to programmatic changes--not a fair test for my guy. Not to say no consequences....I never say that, just that we know our kids and what will push them over the edge. And it does make us hostage to their rages, but I have to remember he is hostage to them too. So many disciplinary actions every single day. I wish there was an easy answer, a magic cure. i dont get why these guys have to go thru such trauma/drama for just being born.

    People tell me doing this as a single mom must be hard, but I really think those of you who have a spouse who may not always be on the same page is an extra stressor I wouldn't want right now. I know there are some great ones out there, just for me, I would rather not have one more stressor. I admire you being able to work through all of that. Poor difficult child. I hope the upped medication will help him feel better.


    Bunny...only another parent with a difficult child would understand what it takes to deal with children who are is totally exhausting. And guess what? I wound up dealing with it anyway!! That's a really good point, Buddy, that he is held hostage to them are ABSOLUTELY right. I told my older son while we were TorT last night that sometimes I just want to seal difficult child away from the world and shield him from everything. I'm not sure about the Prozac. Still waiting for call back from psychiatric. It definitely isn't JUST situational because little by little some of the old behaviors have been returning even before Halloween. But who knows? I just spoke to him and he had an excellent day!! No leaving the classroom and no one had to be called to help manage him. As far as spouses, my relationship with my husband has never been easy but I know he tries his best. He is a lot like difficult child...inflexible. but he's alot better than he used to be and to a large extent, he's really being provoked. difficult child says things to him when he's angry that I wouldn't even say. There are times when no response is best but difficult child HAS to have the last word and has to be right. We were separated last year for about five apartment...everything moved out...the works but it was not all that much better and at times I really missed the support he def gives me most of the time. And I don't think anyone will ever be able to love difficult child like his own dad does so we're back together, trudging through. I just wish he wouldn't take everything difficult child says personally because frankly, after 8 years of this ****, that's just stupid...LOL
  10. keista

    keista New Member

    I 100% think you did the right thing by letting him go trick or treating. Yeah, it went downhill anyway, but in my opinion it would have been worse if you tried taking it away as a punishment for something he has very little control over.

    I too think it's the Prozac. That was DD1's first medication. It was good, then bad, then upped, then good, then bad, then upped, then bad, bad, bad. psychiatrist kept saying it was NOT the medications, but ODD. Funny, she didn't have ODD BEFORE the Prozac.
  11. lovelyboy

    lovelyboy Member

    Sorry you are going through such a bad time.....I don't know Prozac...just tried to use it once and I was so terrible anxious, I stopped it...

    I see in you siggie that they suspect AS....must say, your son sounds SO MUCH like mine...he also has some bit of ODD and was diagnosed with AS and some Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) traids....why I mention this, is because this does put some credit on the point that this behaviour might be alot to do with, excitement and anxiety relating halloween, little sleep, sensory overload...Sounds alot like problems with shifting from one activity to the next, routine being changed and literal thinking.
    I would just hang on a bit with medications like psychiatrist prescribed it and try and get him back in good routine, familiar sensory stuff and fun things and see how it goes!(((((HUGS)))))


    @lovelyboy...things have calmed down. yesterday he had a good day in school and since I haven't received any call, I'm assuming today wasn't horrible Going to bed last night was better who knows? Maybe it did have a lot to do with the holiday. Your son is 8? My son also had the Encopresis. Matter of fact, he experienced that about a month ago after not having it for years. He seems to always be constipated and takes Miralax. He does have a lot of problems with transitions which is why the thought of MS next year scares me to death!!