Things seem to be going well...

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by toughlovin, Feb 28, 2014.

  1. toughlovin

    toughlovin Well-Known Member

    Hi Everyone,

    Well I am feeling hopeful although past experience makes me very afraid to get too hopeful, which is probably a good thing. On Monday we saw my gig. I was nervous because we had not heard or see him for 2 weeks and I knew the whole house was "on restriction" which meant stuff in general was going on an so they had lost all privileges including phone calls and visits. So we went to the parent meeting on Monday and then were allowed to visit. I had heard that my gig was actually doing pretty well and had handled several situations well… but i was still expecting that with us we would get a litany of complaints and grousing about the place and the staff. None of that happened. He seemed in good spirits, seemed to understand the process and why they were on restriction and trying to do what he needed to do for his part. Really a different attitude than we have seen before! Several people have left but he is still there and he has been there for 4 months!! I am very happy about that. We shall see how he handles it when he gets the next level and has more freedom as well as more responsibility. So for now i am very pleased and hopeful. I thought the board could use some good news!

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  2. Childofmine

    Childofmine one day at a time Staff Member

    That is so great TL. Thank you for posting this. People can recover and it is so go to hear these positive stories of hope. I am very glad for you.

    Have a great day today and relax in this good news.
  3. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    So so happy to read this!!!! :)

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  4. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Wonderful news TL. Maybe he really is wanting things to be different. I am so hopeful for you. Thanks for the great update.
  5. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Hi TL,
    Good news is always apprecitated around here! ;-)

    I'm so glad that difficult child has adjusted to his environment and is accepting the given's. How nice that ya'll got to have a conversation without complaints!

  6. toughlovin

    toughlovin Well-Known Member

    Well believe it or not things are continuing to go well. He made the next level in the program so that now they are sending him to his drug court appearances once a month. They are letting him go by himself by train....about a 90 minute trip back to his old haunts. So today was the first one... I picked him up at the train station (not far from me) and took him to court. In many ways I think this was more for me than for him as I kind of want to see what they say.

    Anyway it all went well.... and it is interesting to see the others in drug court... some really making progress and some not. One guy was detained today for violating his probation (by drinking). i think it is good for difficult child to see all of that.

    The judge asked my son what he was doing different from another guy that was at his program that was kicked out... and my difficult child said "I decided I needed to make a change!".

    So I dropped him off at the station. I kind of wanted to wait for the train to make sure he got on.... but decide I really need to just let go so I didnt. I figure if he doesnt make it back they will call me.

    He was really pretty positive about everything.

    So I continue to be hopeful.


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  7. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    That is awesome news, T. We needed some of that around here.
  8. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Well-Known Member

    So so happy to read this TL!!! Maybe he is finally figuring out what he was doing is not working for him. :)

    On another note - we may be headed up your way for a week this summer - would LOVE to meet you!! :D
  9. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    Great news!
  10. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    So good to hear TL, it's been a long time before you could report such positive progress and we all hope it just gets better and better.
  11. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Fingers crossed that he is actually getting the message. He is so young that he truly could follow a path to life success. I'm happy that you're seeing meaningful progress. Hugs DDD
  12. toughlovin

    toughlovin Well-Known Member

    Thanks all.....a part of me wonders how serious he is because I am sure at least a part of him is just trying to do what he needs to do to get throught the program. I mean he has certainly done that before.... but this is the longest time he has sustained it. And what really gives me hope is his attitude. It is more positive.

    There was another guy there yesterday who was saying he refused to go to the program difficult child is in and waited until they could find him another one. The program does not have a good reputation in jail because it is very strict. I looked at difficult child and said "Is it really that bad". He looked at me and kind of smiled and said it is hard at first...and its because they are strict. I said that is not always a bad thing and he agreed. But he is not complaining.... its not that he is always waxing enthusiastically but he is not complaining and that is different.

    I think one thing is that the rules and strictness is making sense to him. I dont think he feels he is being treated unfairly and fairness has always been a thing for him. And I think that when others have been asked to leave that has also made sense to him.

    And PG I would love to meet you.... so when you have your plans PM me.


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