Today is a bad day

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by uncheerleader, Feb 21, 2008.

  1. uncheerleader

    uncheerleader Pollyanna

    Well the past 9 days or so have been great with difficult child. I've been realy trying to enjoy them, but, I've been waiting for the bad day. Today is that day.

    He started talking about how he's out of $$ and he doesn't know where it went. Then he starts thinking about it and realizes that he's spent over $70 in gas because of his 'friends'. The more he talks about it the more agitated he gets. He talks about how the other night he got so upset while driving that he pulled over and crawled into the back seat and 'fell asleep or I don't even know what I did!!!' He had to have his 'friend' drive. This is the 'friend' that got him all worked up in the first place.
    I asked him if he told the Dr. at his visit and he said no because it was the night after the appointment. that he started having all the stress. Hmmm that was the day he spent with the 'friends' that caused all of his gas use and of course didn't give him any $$ for gas. The more he talks about it the more and more filled with rage he becomes, before I can stop him he bangs his head into the wall and leaves a dent in the wall. Now he's all upset that his Dad is going to be angry and starts talking about all the things that make him mad about his Dad.
    After about 10 mins of raging he's calm and sounding depressed and tired. One of the good friends (a friend we approve of) is over during all of this and they talk quietly for a while. He gets into bed and wants to lay down for a while.
    He's also told me that he is tired ALL the time and that even when he sleeps good, he feels like he hasn't. 'Did you tell the Dr.?' I say. No. I tell him to tell the Dr. all this stuff and he starts again getting upset. 'I can't explain what the problem is' he says 'how can they help?' I tell him that he has to try.
    I tell him this is a bad day and to take one day at a time. Tomorrow will come and be better.
    He starts his meter reader job tomorrow. I tell him that this is stressful and stress is hard for him. But he will get through it.
    I hope he does.

  2. scent of cedar

    scent of cedar New Member

    I think you handled a really stressful situation very well.

    We need to remember to give ourselves credit when we have said and done the right things for our children, though they may not be able to see it that way.

    I think you did great.

  3. Star*

    Star* call 911


    I am sorry you are having to sift through the sands of a difficult child. I'm doing similar work here - except I have just flat out stopped talking to my son. Tonight I decided that if I talk, or open my mouth - I get yelled at for helping soooo I'm not helping, not talking, not suggesting, not bailing him out of things he's broken today - not yelling about the plants he ripped leaves off of, not screaming about using dow scrubbing bubbles on my maple dining room claw foot table that left white clouds, not accusing because my photo albums are missing huge amounts of pictures, not crying because the only room in the house with nice carpet left - he's eating in, or about his stealing his dad's biker magazines, or using 2 down filled pillow toppers for jumping on - without permission, or using my headphones and breaking the plastic piece, or grounding grapes into the kitchen floor, or using a full cup of laundry detergent to wash 1 pair of jeans, .......

    Gosh you're right - talking about it does make you feel better. Thanks

    Sorry again you are having such a bad night - sometimes when they figure out which friends ARE leaches it takes a while because then they HAVE to admit they were....wwwwww......wrrrrrr. wrong. And we can't have that.