Here is the update to my post which is in the general forum difficult child called me today. Her husband was at home, so she had to be evasive. Last Friday was the day difficult child called me telling me about her problems. Last Friday night her husband came home early from work and rubbed her feet and made her breakfast the following morning .he told her he came home early coz he felt he was loosing his marriage he said he called into burger king (part time job) and told them that he wasnt going in work that day coz his marriage was rocky and left work at Wal-Mart early that evening. So difficult child like felt things were going to be ok coz he tried to pamper her. It turns out he left Wal-Mart (full time job) that evening and has not returned back to work. He hasnt given them notice. As of right this minute her husband is sitting at home watching a dvd collection that my sister-in-law lent them. Her husband isnt concerned about money or the lack of food. difficult child hasnt got her Medicaid card so she cant go to her 36-37 week checkup. Im wondering if she tells me all this stuff to frustrate me or whether she thinks I will jump in and take over. I want to, but I know it wont help either one of them if I do. I am so sick (with the flu) right now. difficult child told me she will ride the bus to the doctors tomorrow if she has spare change and that she needs to still do her laundry at the laundry mat (usually I chauffer her around everywhere to get her errands done). I told her we could have the meeting but she said we shouldnt coz Im too sick. I am so annoyed. She is so blasé about the whole thing. I keep saying how could her husband do this to her (meaning not show up for work) and she says .I know mom. I got so peeved off I said if u guys dont have food to feed your baby he will be taken away from you and it wont be me or her dcfs worker calling dcfs it will be your neighbors listening to her baby cry, they will call dcfs on you. difficult childs husband doesnt seem to care and she has to watch what she says around him coz he is edgy right now. Her husband is waiting for his dad to get him an application for some welding job. I asked difficult child if I can invite her old dcfs worker to the meeting, she insisted that I not involve her. I told difficult child her dcfs worker has more knowledge in government help then all of us put together. She still does not want her there. I asked why and she said coz her worker will ask her whos responsibility it is to get stuff sorted out. difficult child knows all of her problems will be placed back onto her not palmed off onto everyone else at the meeting if dcfs worker is invited. I said to difficult child wouldnt you rather hear it bluntly then us beating around the bush... this is your responsibility not anyone elses. Basically difficult child doesnt want to hear what she really needs to hear. difficult childs cell phone has been temporarily turned off coz her husband has ticked up $$ worth of games and songs they cant afford. So in 3 weeks there baby will be here. The rent will be due along with the electricity bill. I know a lot can happen in 3 weeks. What marguerite said was right on the money.. I think difficult child plans on keeping this baby because the baby offers unconditional love. weeping willow: I am at where you are at . I dont have the energy to go through this again. So difficult child wont be moving back in with me. She can go to a shelter, they can advise her on what to do.