I'm very new to this group, and haven't done this before. My 7 year old difficult child is currently in a residential facility here in Montana. He's been diagnosed with severe conduct disorder, reactive attachment disorder, adhd and dyslexia. I'm his adopted mom, his bio mom was abusive and neglectful, and left him when he was two with his father, who is now my husband. I have a 7 year old girl from a previous marriage, and 2 and 1 year old girls with husband. This is difficult child's second stint in residential treatment. He has tried to kill his sisters on several occasions, physically attacked me and his father, and is now provoking his peers on the unit he resides on until they snap and attack him. (He does love playing the victim.) He's expressed no desire to come home, or work on his treatment. He's been in residential for 3 months, and has refused to participate in group therapy, individual therapy, or journal writing. I'm not sure how long our insurance will cover his stay as he's made absolutely no progress, and we're all terrified of him coming home any time soon. He came home for a visit over Thanksgiving, and I had to take him back to his unit a day early because he was violent and disruptive. He spent the drive to the facility trying to talk me into killing myself so that I would be dead, but he wouldn't have to kill me and then get into trouble for it. He has repeatedly said that when he comes home, he will do everything in his power to kill me and the girls, so that he can have his father all to himself. He has no empathy, no love for anyone or anything besides Legos, and will try to kill people in order to get more Legos (trust me, he's tried.) I guess I'm just wondering if there's anyone here that's in the same boat. I can't really talk to anyone about this, husband shuts down and will try to change the subject, and no other parent I know understands and seems to blame our parenting -obviously we must be doing SOMETHING wrong to have a child this disturbed. I've even had "friends" recommend parenting classes to better serve difficult child. Even though all the other children are well adjusted, happy kids. They seem to think that since I'm the step mother, I must be doing something to cause these behaviors.