What do you do when nothing works???

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by bran155, Jul 14, 2008.

  1. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    I went to see my daughter in the hospital last night. She is completely out of control, as I knew she would be. The doctors said upon her admission, she will stay until they can stabilize her. (yeah, aint gonna happen) She has been in the hospital 9 times and on every drug imaginable, all to no avail. I explained this to them several times. She has been diagnosed with Borderline. The research I have done all says there just is no medication to help with that. Hence, that is why nothing has worked for her. So what now? How can they discharge her when she is not stable? Nothing about her has changed, she is hyper, very angry, cursing at everyone, has pressured speech, racing thoughts, her mood switches in seconds, she is the same kid I admitted 2 weeks ago. What exactly do they mean when they say "stable"?

    For instance, last night our visit started out great. She was eating the chinese food I brought her and we were having a good conversation, that lasted about 10 minutes and then in a blink of an eye, she flipped!!! She saw my key chain with the picture of her little brother on it and got very, very angry. It was bizarre to see her switch her mood so drastically, so quickly. Pretty scary. She just went off, cursing me out, blaming me for her life, saying it was my fault that she couldn't see her brother and all that she is missing at home. I ruined her summer, yada, yada, yada...... I threatened to leave if she didn't calm down and stop cursing at me, she then told me to get the @#$% out and walked away. So I left in tears feeling so badly for her. I saw her mental illness so clearly and it was just so sad to watch. I of course have seen it plenty of times before, but I was hoping the hospital was helping and of course it's not. So now what? Does it ever get to a point where the docs just sort of give up and send her home anyway?

    I am just at a loss and don't know how much longer of this life I can take. If she is this way in the hospital, it will only be 10 times worse when she comes home. HELP!
  2. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    I can't imagine they will send her home like this. But I could be wrong, I have never been down the admission path yet.

    Have you talked to them about their plan?
  3. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    What medications is she currently taking?

    What medications is she weaning off of?

    Has the psychiatrist said why he thinks she has Borderline instead of Bipolar Disorder?

    Has she ever taken a combo of mood stabilizer and/or atypical antipsychotic without also taking an antidepressant?
  4. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    She has been on so many different medication combo's in the past. She has taken mood stabilizer's/antipsychotic's for several years. She has been on them alone. Nothing as of yet has made a difference. I swear she has horse blood, she eats right through all the medications and can fight them off, even the prns!!! She has such a high tolerance. One doctor told me once that he has never seen a child's metabolism eat through the medication the way hers does. Pretty scary.

    Years ago the school psychologist said he thought she had Borderline Personality Disorder, then was given the diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder. She has been treated for BiPolar (BP) for many years and nothing has worked. Her most recent psychiatrist as well as her therapist thought it was Borderline. Her therapist actually specializes in treating Borderlines. After doing the research I am convinced that diagnosis is accurate. She could possibly have both, but there is no doubt in my mind that she has Borderline (BPD).

    I am waiting to hear from the doctor now.
  5. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    To answer the medication question: She is on 80mgs of Geodon in the am and at bedtime. She is on 900mgs of Lithium, given to her 3 times a day (totaling 900mgs), she is being weaned off Trazadone. They are going to titrate down on the Lithium and switch her to Lamictal. She has never been on Lamictal, so I am crossing my fingers hoping that does something for her.

    When she leaves the hospital she should only be on the Geodon and the Lamictal.
  6. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Oh, Bran, how heartbreaking.
    She sounds a little like my s-i-l, who refuses to admit there's anythiing wrong with-her, and whose husband travels to get away from her. Sigh.

    So, what do you do for Borderline (BPD)?

    If they try to discharge her when she's like that, I would argue and argue. They've got to work harder.
  7. seekinghope

    seekinghope New Member

    I know your situation well, although I have only been dealing with this for the past year I can totally relate to the mood swings. My son can change in mid breath. I never know what will set him off. He can go from swearing , cursing and whaling, to a calm conversation.
    I just called the library for the explosive child. Some one else, I think recommended the mainpulative child. I would like to read that too, but do not know the author???
    My son was currantly taken off all medications to flush out his system and see how he reacts.Problem is a controled enviorment will not be the same as a non controled one. So who knows what to do?
    I hope you find the help you need.

  8. bran, this is truly heartbreaking. I am so sorry your daughter is having so many problems. I certainly hope they don't discharge her like this, it would be awful. I hope they are are able to find something that works for her.

    Hugs to you,

  9. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    You CAN refuse to take her back into your custody. Of course, that does bring up a whole other mess with CPS. But, if you and your family are truly not safe with her home - perhaps it is the best way for all involved.

  10. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Well, you have a seventeen year old on your hands. I don't know her history. I'm assuming there is some drug abuse. My psychiatrist (I have bipolar) believes that borderline is on the bipolar spectrum and gives mood stabilizers to his borderlines with good results. Borderline is becoming kind of controversial with many professionals believing it is part of the mood disorder spectrum. I had a Borderline (BPD) diagnosis. too at one time, but I've been told, since getting stable, that I don't have it--that the symptoms were due to the out-of-control moods.
    Sadly, your daughter doesn't have much time left in which you can influence her treatment. I want to tell you that I understand and empathize with you and hope that your daughter gets better. It is kind of up to her. I have one child who did drugs until 19 and decided to quit. She is doing great. You never know if she wants to work hard at her treatment and comply with her medications. At her age, she will also have some idea if her medications are working or making her worse (as some medications do). Also, if she is doing recreational drugs, she will have to stop doing them. I know she is in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) now, but sometimes there is access to drugs, and sometimes there is withdrawal IF she was ever taking them. You may have to find a place for her to live at eighteen if she won't comply with treatment or get help. That may be the only thing that works--her hitting rock bottom. That's what turned my daughter around. I wish you both a lot of luck.
  11. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    Thank you all for your support and advice. I just tried to call my daughter and not to my surprise, she has lost her phone use, she was calling the boys pay phone from the girls pay phone. I am hardly shocked.

    Midwest mom: She's not actually in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) right now, she is in the hospital. She has been in 3 Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s to date and her social worker is working to get her placed once again. The 18 thing scares the heck out of me, however my sw has put in an application for something called SPOA, it is for psychiatric services and even when she is 18 it will allow me to make decisions for her regarding placement and treatment. Keeping my fingers crossed. And yes, of course there is drug use. She smokes a lot of pot!!! Nothing else to my knowledge. Her tox screens have always come back positive for marijuana only. Thank God for small favors!! (well so far, anyway)

    Thanks again for the kind words. I will keep you all posted. God bless. :)
  12. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Wish I had some advice-just offering hugs your way.
  13. Sara PA

    Sara PA New Member

    She's completely off the Lexapro and now they're taking her off the Trazadone? In how short a time? A week? Did anyone tell you that discontinuing antidepressants can cause mood swings and emotional lability as a side effect? These aren't problems associated with the reason the person is taking the AD, it's because of the AD. Acute withdrawal lasts about two weeks. But for some people the discontinuation problems can last months. You might want to google "SSRI withdrawal" or "Lexapro withdrawal".

    The unfortuante situation is that these drugs should really be stopped quite slowly, over weeks or months. And most of them should be started just as slowly. (Considering many of these drugs take 2, 4, 8 weeks to become therapeutic, I can't help wondering if some people would do as well or better on their medications at half the doses.) It's virtually impossible to sort out withdrawal issues from disorder issues while in the process of removing an antidepressant.
  14. amazeofgrace

    amazeofgrace New Member

    I am so sorry, and she is on Lithium and it's not helping? That is so hard.

    <<<HUGS>>> sounds like she made need residential for her safety and your sanity