Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by rdugirl, Feb 24, 2009.
rdugirl, we have a policy not to mention programs, doctors or facilities by name on the site so I omitted from your post the name of the wilderness program you're considering. We invite members to contact you by PM to provide info about specific wilderness programs they've used or to ask for more specifics about the program you're considering.
Hi rdugirl, welcome
How long is the program? Hey, I don't see a problem with-that. I sent my son to an abbreviated version last summer and it was awesome.
(Also awesome was the price. ) But it was worth it.
I think wilderness programs are great.
I do not like the traditional military camp programs ... they emphasize discipline and toughness, over excitement and accomplishment, Know what I mean??
This a.m. I told my son that if he tells me, "I don't care," one more time, he will be charged 25 cents for ea time. He immediately retorted, "I meant that I don't care that I have to write the abstract for the science expo at school today." (We were having a conversation about it.)
I said, "That's the kind of thing I mean. That's your last warning."
"Only if I say it in front of you."
"Of course. If you say it in front of a tree in the middle of nowhere, the tree can't charge you money."
"Why would I say it in front of a tree?!"
rdugirl....PM me about the wilderness camp. I used a wilderness camp in NC, I live in NC, I know about another wilderness camp (one I didnt use but considered), and might be able to help you in some other ways.
They can be great. My difficult child benefited from one - however, because of his mental illness, and the lack of access to a psychiatrist, his bi-polar became unmanageable within a short time and he had to be sent to a phosph.
If your son does not have outstanding psychiatric issues, and needs motivation, discipline, and to get in touch with the reality of the world, I would highly recommend them.
As others have said you absolutely have to be careful, and choose only reputable places, that have a proven track record.
Good luck. Keep us posted.
My neighbor backed out 14 days from admission due to the kid who died of the West Nile virus in a wilderness program in that area. He was supposed to go to North Carolina.
However, I feel that some of the wilderness programs can benefit. If they just wasn't so expensive.
In fact now when our local residential program, which was so excellent have been accused of anything possible bad, I have been looking at alternatives. Our minister was forced to sell his program to some people from Utah/South Carolina and kids from one of their other schools was transported in. It is now a totally other program and the kids run away all time.
My cusin lives in Minnesota and he has helped me find a outward bound program in that area. The problem in my household is not drugs (as far as I can test for it). It is alcohol and disrespect, so our plan is that he would come down and with help from our school teacher we will all do an intervention on her. Outward bound program doesn't have to tight a security so we have to get her over the first 12 in just one afternoon.
However the price for the program is "just" about 6100 for 28 days of Canoeing & Rock Climbing. While they cannot offer deep therapeutic treatment, we feel that 28 sober days could break her negative path and get her ready for going to meetings etc.
We don't want to punish her. She is a follower always unsecure of herself and needs to get some self-esteem so she can stand up for herself and say no when all the other kids are drinking.
When we sent difficult child to wilderness camp, I looked at it this way: at least she was safe, sheltered, supervised and getting positive peer pressure. Those are things I could not guarantee when she was defiantly running around and staying out all night at 14-15 years of age.
You might want to use humor - when he says you just want him sent away say, "if that were the case, I wouldn't care that you're out with your friends all the time!" Stick to your guns and don't fall for the guit trap!
I have a friend that sent her son to a wilderness program in WVA that she really liked. I don't know what part of NC you are in, but I will look up the name nad PM it to you, just in case. From what she told me, the program was excellent and she was very pleased... especially with the amount of parent involvement there was in the process and therapy pieces. She did have to re-mortgage her house to pay for it, however.
Unfortunately, despite her son doing well in the program and coming home "clean and sober" and ready to change his life, he chose to get back in with the same crowd of friends, and within a couple of months had slipped back into the same old behaviors. So, please keep that in mind. These programs can be very good, but they are no guarantee of a "cure."
Wow, I just found site for the program in WVA but it has apparently closed down due to economic reasons. No surprise there, with the current economic climate. That's too bad.
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