36 did something very GOOD for a change!!

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by MidwestMom, Aug 21, 2014.

  1. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    He, like Julie, did not tell me about it until it is almost done, but he quit benozos!!!! This was a man who was taking 8 mgs. of Xanax as prescribed and got into at least one accident due to falling asleep while driving. I didn't think you could quit benzos by just reducing them, but he is doing that.

    First he asked his doctor to switch him to Clonazapan which is much easier to withdraw from, although it's not easy. Then he asked what he should do to get off of it. I guess it was interfering with sex...I mean, there HAD to be a good reason and he hinted at that...lol. So now he is down to 1 mg. of Clonazapen and has not had horrible side effects, really. He has terrible anxiety disorder so if he had suffered much, he would have called me in angst and probably gone right back on. Today he forgot to take it. He called this morning from work and said, "Mom, I'm done. I'm not taking even the small dose ever again."

    I asked him if he was self-medicating the side effects with alcohol and he said no, he had actually cut his alcohol too for same reason. I have to say that, for whatever reason he did these things, I am grateful. I don't have to worry that he'll overdose on Xanax/alcohol. Could he be lying? I doubt it. I don't talk to him about his drug/alcohol consumption and he didn't really know I was worried. The few times I brought it up, he was so vile and abusive that I figured he needed to do this himself or not and I shut up on the topic. I figured my two cents would not change anything. Been about three years since I've brought it up to him.

    He still chews (GROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!). He tried it once and got hooked the first time so I figured he is an addictive personality. But the chew is the only thing he says he isn't going to quit right now because he can't do everything at once. WEll, he's not QUITTING alcohol, but knowing he is only having one glass after work is a big improvement and I didn't fish for the info. Doesn't mean he has no alcohol problem, just means right now he's not drinking as much. When he's drunk, I can tell. He talks fast, slurs his words, etc. Haven't heard him doing that lately. He is also more abusive when drunk.

    Anyhow, that's as good as it gets with 36. He has been making small improvement since the custody case. It really shook him up to know he could lose his son if he messes up. I hope this continues. I have no opinion on whether or not it will, but wanted to share some decent news for a change.
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  2. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Thats great! It is hard to quit the benzo's not so much because you are getting high from them but because your body becomes dependent on them. I take a 3 mg long acting form of Xanax and if I miss it for more than a day or two I can really tell. My muscles twitch. I cant tell Im taking it when I do take it other than my anxiety is less but it helps with my fibro too. When my muscles start to twitch it hurts horribly!

    I know how you feel about the chewing too. Its a very hard habit to quit too. Just like smoking. Tony chewed tobacco from the time I met him and he couldnt quit. Finally maybe two or so years ago he quit because it caused so much damage in his mouth. He had to have all his teeth pulled and got dentures. Maybe you could tell your son about that because Im sure he doesnt want to go through all that. Its very hard though. Tony said just the other night he dreamed he bought a pack of chew! Im hoping one day soon I can say I have quit smoking cigs. Sigh.
  3. dstc_99

    dstc_99 Well-Known Member

    Wow! Glad to hear that for once you and 36 had a good experience with talking. I know that doesn't happen often so WOW!
  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Oh, we have times when he isn't abusive. He is abusive when he is under pressure and sometimes downright scary. But when things are going well in his life, he acts pretty normal (emphasis on the pretty). That does not mean he makes good decisions, but at least he isn't blasting me. This going off the benzos really surprised me. Since I'm always complaining about him, thought I'd give him kudos when he deserved them. Will he STAY off benzos? We'll see.
  5. hopeandjoy66

    hopeandjoy66 Member

    Good to hear MWM. Praise where praise is do, but I do understand that underlying caution. For today we say Yah Hoo!
    One day at a time.
  6. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    That is wonderful news, MWM. My difficult child recently spent 11 days in detox getting off of benzos. They told her it was the hardest drug to detox from and she said it was hell.

  7. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Wow! Good for both of them then! Way To Go on your daughter, Kathy :)