Scent of Cedar *
Well-Known Member
Thanks all. We had a terrible storm and we have no power. Everyone is safe and no damage for us. The neighborhood looks like a war zone. I may be gone a few days.
Oh, there you are, pigless!
:O)
Cedar
Thanks all. We had a terrible storm and we have no power. Everyone is safe and no damage for us. The neighborhood looks like a war zone. I may be gone a few days.
I don't know at this point what the outcome will be, but I'm okay with that.
OK. So this is good. Now you know. It is on the table.His anger is a huge problem for me, too.
I am like you, Pigless. I have spent my life overcoming limitations and losses and aspiring to have more. Relationships were sacrificed or were not the priority.The problem for me now is that there is no one else. I do not have supportive family members. I do not have a best friend. I also have a huge farm and giant mortgage on it.
Well. I see this differently. He did summon up the courage by telling you 3/4 time through the counseling. Better late than never. Joke.him knowing what he did regarding his work, but not telling you before counseling.
I see this as a universal of human behavior. Everybody has a persona, an image of themselves that they both present to others, and to themselves. This persona is a coherent picture imposed on a real self that is fluid and chaotic,anything but coherent. When stuff comes to the fore, to consciousness, that is inconsistent with our picture of who we are and who we want others to believe we are--we can choose to project responsibility onto the other, or to accept the painful and incongruent picture of ourselves that has emerged.They tell us they are who they pretended to be, but that we are making it impossible for them to be that good person we still believe they are.
I think this is exactly so, Cedar, except I think that both people in the relationship are (hopefully) doing it, and the us refers to each of them. This kind of appraisal, to my way of thinking is the optimal process. Not all me. Not all you. What piece of this is me? What piece of this is you? What can I live with? What not? And being able to sustain the relationship while during this process. An elasticity (and safety) sufficient to hold together.Somehow, both people in the relationship come to believe that the person letting everyone down is us.
Which is exactly what pigless is doing.For my piece in all of this, I am not vocal enough when something happens that upsets or angers me.
Thank you, SWOT. You remember, I know, that sometimes I have had my doubts. Still, sometimes I do, just not as much.Cop a, you have a gem in M. He will so work with you. You are both very lucky to have found one another. You two are a good example to your son, whether he expresses it or not.
Thank you SWOT. He has been wonderful to my son. And I believe my son sees this. But M is difficult. He is demanding and a perfectionist. I think it is good that my son see that M does it to me too.M. Has been wonderful to your son.
I do and sometimes I can't believe my good fortune. Who would have guessed it a year ago? Thank you SWOT.you now have your family together.
And he announces each one he discovers (while holding it up in the air like a mouse by the tail) as if trumpets should sound
I get it, Copa. I really do.
Just the kind of thing Hubby would do.
Copa, my Hubby does the same kind of thing. I once asked him if he wanted a gold star for cleaning the litter boxes. He did not think I was funny.
Actually, the litterpans need to be completely changed monthly. At that time, they should be cleaned and sanitized. Allow them to dry and fill with new, clean litter.
GN (too much experience with litter boxes)
I clean my toilet DAILY, not because I'm a psycho, but because Thomas the cat drinks out of it, and leaving the lid down isn't a deterrent.
I agree with this.Each of us does need to take responsibility for choosing and holding on to and refusing to accept less than, a guiding imagery of how we want our lives to feel.
And this.Tom Petty song about not living like a refugee, but that we have to fight to be free?
I clean my toilet DAILY, not because I'm a psycho, but because Thomas the cat drinks out of it, and leaving the lid down isn't a deterrent.