so very depressed

[Jena]

i'm soo late to this and i'm sorry...... don't do it to yourself i've done it too. maybe if i had done this or that etc. they'd be better or not a difficult child.

listen mantra "i've done the best I could, for the person i was at the time and the person i am today" that is all you can ask of yourself and that's alot. you give and give we all do and days like this hit with sheer UGH being the feeling of hte day week or month.

let yourself feel angry you are soo allowed to it. yet than take all that anger and channel it into semothing to do for you adn only you. sorry misspelling everything!

your a great mom, they will do what they do it's their life they own it. we dont own them or their actions. i'm practicing detatchment everyday.

sending alot of hugs! hang in there. glad he's ok, yet dont' own it. it's him not you. you gave him the greatest gift life. it's up to them what they chose to do with it!

 

[Kjs]

Thanks everyone. well, I did go to psychiatrist. He didn't suggest any medication's other than something else to try to help me sleep. I don't get much of that. Especially the end of the week when I work. Maybe 2 or 3 hours. People don't seem to understand that when THEY sleep at night...I do not, I work. So when I am there when everyone wakes up they think I can just keep going. psychiatrist suggested small dose of remeron (sp?) Didn't fill it yet.

Wedding shower and Wedding things are really getting to me. Didn't know Bridal Showers are so elaborate. (sp?..again) I am not a fancy person. Plain and simple. Guess not many others are like that.

difficult child has been a little better. But, been down this road a million times. Not a lot of faith it will stay this way. He went to psychiatrist. Then she talked to me and said "HE needs a car" WHAT???? He got a job but it is in the next town 15 miles away. Nope, do not agree. He will have to earn this next car and even with that I have difficult saying yes.

They did do a drug test, a hair test. He had his wisdom teeth out 6 weeks ago. So has vicodin and tylenol #3, plus Lamictal and Vyvanse and Klonipin. Sure hope they don't hold that against him. He would feel horrible.

I am feeling better. You guys really help. Thank you.

Thanks Cubsgirl for meeting with me. It was nice to have someone to talk to.

Thanks guys.

 

[Star*]

Bridal showers? Okay this older lady I know - late to early 80's just a hoot - says to me yesterday -

Ya know - I got picked by my Church committe to do this danged 'bridal' shower. (and she does the finger quotes) and makes a face. Then she looks at me and says "Well I can tell by YOUR enthusiastiac face you like m just as much as I do. WTH and she said the H word - is WRONG with these ding bats?

I just stood silent because this is good comic material for Friday night...Know what I mean??

Then she exhales and is digging in the linen bin at the Goodwill and says with an aire of discontent - "They've lived together for three years, had sex for God knows how many years, and now all of a sudden Sister Scarlet wants a white wedding AND a bridal shower and I'm supposed to just leap through firey hoops to give her a virginal, sugary, shower of cake and presents and all the (she said the poo word that rhymes with rap) and you know this woman had tha AUDACITY to say to me - "Do you suppose we can have it in your backyard with some of your linens and make it pretty with your fine china?" I said "Well how did you answer her?"

She said "Why do you think I'm here getting these cheap cups and bed sheets?" I'm not draggin out my Grandmothers bone china and Damask for that tramp.......and you know what really burns my butt? In less than a year? She'll be set up in an apartment of her own and all these gifts she gets? She'll keep - after the divorce.

OMW!!!!!!!

So if it's any comfort? Someone here in Columbia - Is having a bridal shower in the back yard of this gals house - with bedsheets, silk flowers and mis-matched stoneware. I think she's going to call it Shabby - tramp and be done with it. Oh and FYI - she said - IF someone says anything? She's just going to pretend she has the onset of alzheimers - and leave it at that so she's not asked again. She feels they shouldn't have asked her in the first place, put her on the spot, didn't really give her a choice - so she's making a statement. I told her she should really bow out - and she said - she tried, but the woman who is getting married - wouldn't HEAR of anyone else throwiing it - and NOT because anyone else coudln't do it - but because she KNEW this woman has a nice home, nice back yard, nice crystal, nice linens - and was certain that since she's never been married? She'd give her a $$$ party. SURPRISE is right. Next time ? Give the elderly an option. lol and 1/2

I love this gal.

 

[cubsgirl]

Thanks everyone. well, I did go to psychiatrist. He didn't suggest any medication's other than something else to try to help me sleep. I don't get much of that. Especially the end of the week when I work. Maybe 2 or 3 hours. People don't seem to understand that when THEY sleep at night...I do not, I work. So when I am there when everyone wakes up they think I can just keep going. psychiatrist suggested small dose of remeron (sp?) Didn't fill it yet.

Wedding shower and Wedding things are really getting to me. Didn't know Bridal Showers are so elaborate. (sp?..again) I am not a fancy person. Plain and simple. Guess not many others are like that.

difficult child has been a little better. But, been down this road a million times. Not a lot of faith it will stay this way. He went to psychiatrist. Then she talked to me and said "HE needs a car" WHAT???? He got a job but it is in the next town 15 miles away. Nope, do not agree. He will have to earn this next car and even with that I have difficult saying yes.

They did do a drug test, a hair test. He had his wisdom teeth out 6 weeks ago. So has vicodin and tylenol #3, plus Lamictal and Vyvanse and Klonipin. Sure hope they don't hold that against him. He would feel horrible.

I am feeling better. You guys really help. Thank you.

Thanks Cubsgirl for meeting with me. It was nice to have someone to talk to.

Thanks guys.

It was great meeting you - and anytime you want to get together is good with me. I'm really glad you are feeling better.