timer lady
Queen of Hearts
I do believe I got someone's attention. You know those someone's who might be on the treatment team of my tweedles. The ones who promised umpteen years ago when wm was placed in this therapeutic group home that kt & wm would have regular visits. That we would work toward home passes & holidays together. You know, those someone's?
I sent out an email the other day announcing that I would be picking up wm the Wednesday before Thanksgiving & dropping him off the Saturday after Thanksgiving. As the team seemed to be falling down on the job, my family was going to pitch in & give wm something to look forward to.
That kt would be able to see her brother in a family setting while still feeling safe.
I also reminded all involved that this was strictly a voluntary placment & that I could pick wm up at anytime & bring him home. If I can't get out to see wm for whatever reason, I needed help bringing him to come see me. If they didn't feel it was healthy here at home, help me find a better time & place.
I wasn't happy with the "updates" on wm; that I wasn't happy with the visitation schedules or if visits weren't going to happen I wanted a less lame excuse than wm doesn't want to or that kt wants to play with her PCA. I know there are deeper feelings behind these excuses - I want to hear the tweedles express them & then start working through this stuff. Otherwise it will haunt them the rest of their lives - it may anyway.
Additionally, I let these someone's know that because of my inability to get around all these beautiful historical buildings, I couldn't get kt to therapy. I was also dam#ed tired of not hearing back from the tdocs on the team.
Let's just say the day after I sent this little missive, I rec'd something like 8 phone calls from various & sundry "someone's" who had fallen down on their jobs, just a tad.
As you know, if a plan isn't working, I'm all for changing it. The plan has changed.
kt's therapist is transferring her case to the same therapist working with wm. That way, I will be able to get her to therapy; plus this therapist will be working a bit more closely with in home tdocs on sibling relationships & building a stronger family bond. There will be monthly visits between the tweedles with me totally out of the picture. Each individual in home therapist will transport their respective tweedle to treatment. There will be 5 adults to 2 tweedles in those therapy sessions. I believe that will cover it.
wm will be told how hard I worked to get him to come with us for Thanksgiving this year. That it's okay to be sad that he cannot come along this year (he's really not ready nor is kt - I'd hate to set them up to fail). kt will be told that wm isn't coming & again how hard this is on all of us.
In the meantime, for the Christmas holiday, 2 of the tdocs have volunteered to come to our home & help open gifts. husband & I are just to be the parents - the tdocs will step in & teach the tweedles how to be siblings. How to have a pleasant holiday. How to eat a holiday dinner together with-o chaos & competition. Of course, that means I have to feed tdocs - worse things have happened.
So far, neither husband or I could find anything to complain about with this new plan. In fact, we're quite excited to have kt & wm together Christmas to open gifts (in our home) with guidance from tdocs (God bless 'em).
There's a bit of fine tuning - I believe we may be back on track. I know my health has gotten in the way at times. However, I trusted everyone to keep moving toward the individual & family goals. Wrong move - don't die or the treatment plan will die along with you.
I'm feeling much better about the upcoming holiday season - less lonely for my son.
If you read this far - thank you. This is a lot to absorb; a lot to coordinate. And I don't have to do any of it. I'm to enjoy my children & get well. How's that for a plan?
I sent out an email the other day announcing that I would be picking up wm the Wednesday before Thanksgiving & dropping him off the Saturday after Thanksgiving. As the team seemed to be falling down on the job, my family was going to pitch in & give wm something to look forward to.
That kt would be able to see her brother in a family setting while still feeling safe.
I also reminded all involved that this was strictly a voluntary placment & that I could pick wm up at anytime & bring him home. If I can't get out to see wm for whatever reason, I needed help bringing him to come see me. If they didn't feel it was healthy here at home, help me find a better time & place.
I wasn't happy with the "updates" on wm; that I wasn't happy with the visitation schedules or if visits weren't going to happen I wanted a less lame excuse than wm doesn't want to or that kt wants to play with her PCA. I know there are deeper feelings behind these excuses - I want to hear the tweedles express them & then start working through this stuff. Otherwise it will haunt them the rest of their lives - it may anyway.
Additionally, I let these someone's know that because of my inability to get around all these beautiful historical buildings, I couldn't get kt to therapy. I was also dam#ed tired of not hearing back from the tdocs on the team.
Let's just say the day after I sent this little missive, I rec'd something like 8 phone calls from various & sundry "someone's" who had fallen down on their jobs, just a tad.
As you know, if a plan isn't working, I'm all for changing it. The plan has changed.
kt's therapist is transferring her case to the same therapist working with wm. That way, I will be able to get her to therapy; plus this therapist will be working a bit more closely with in home tdocs on sibling relationships & building a stronger family bond. There will be monthly visits between the tweedles with me totally out of the picture. Each individual in home therapist will transport their respective tweedle to treatment. There will be 5 adults to 2 tweedles in those therapy sessions. I believe that will cover it.
wm will be told how hard I worked to get him to come with us for Thanksgiving this year. That it's okay to be sad that he cannot come along this year (he's really not ready nor is kt - I'd hate to set them up to fail). kt will be told that wm isn't coming & again how hard this is on all of us.
In the meantime, for the Christmas holiday, 2 of the tdocs have volunteered to come to our home & help open gifts. husband & I are just to be the parents - the tdocs will step in & teach the tweedles how to be siblings. How to have a pleasant holiday. How to eat a holiday dinner together with-o chaos & competition. Of course, that means I have to feed tdocs - worse things have happened.
So far, neither husband or I could find anything to complain about with this new plan. In fact, we're quite excited to have kt & wm together Christmas to open gifts (in our home) with guidance from tdocs (God bless 'em).
There's a bit of fine tuning - I believe we may be back on track. I know my health has gotten in the way at times. However, I trusted everyone to keep moving toward the individual & family goals. Wrong move - don't die or the treatment plan will die along with you.
I'm feeling much better about the upcoming holiday season - less lonely for my son.
If you read this far - thank you. This is a lot to absorb; a lot to coordinate. And I don't have to do any of it. I'm to enjoy my children & get well. How's that for a plan?