You may recall that my 20pc moved into an apt near campus with her boyfriend (22). He's a chef and works nights and she's a baker/pastry chef and works mornings - their schedules are opposite. Apparently, he is resentful that she doesn't wait up for him at night and/or is always tired or sleeping. She has to be up at 4AM for school and gets home at about 1:30 PM in the afternoon, which is when he goes into school and doesn't get home until about midnight...hours after she's fallen asleep. She sometimes tries to nap in the early evening so she can be up when he gets home. She doesn't expect him to rise at 4AM with her, so she is annoyed and hurt that he's trying to make her feel guilty for being exhausted and sleeping when he gets home from work at midnight. Also, she's confided that their sex life has greatly diminished (because of her). She said she's just so tired all the time and has no desire. He's obviously getting frustrated and feeling disappointed and no doubt neglected because of this. I know in the back of her head she is worried that he's going to cheat on her, but it's almost as if she's too tired to think about it. On his Facebook account, he has new "friends" that are girls just about everyday. These were some of the concerns H and I had when they decided to live with one another - that their schedules would get in the way, that they'd be too busy and pissy to enjoy the time they did have together, that one would be understanding and one would not, that they would grow in different directions, and that their relationship was too new to handle all the ups and downs of a live in relationship. easy child has a lot of outside interests and up until early July (when her friends all move or go home) she spends her afternoons with her girlfriends (boyfriend is at school). She goes rock climbing (bouldering) or bike riding or just hangs. Lately, she's been too tired to do any of that and she feels guilty for hanging out with friends when she barely has time to hang with the boyfriend - despite the fact that he's not available when she is anyway. Then, add to that she got the puppy which takes a lot of time, training and work on top of her already stressed schedule (I am actually taking the pup for a couple of weeks while she finishes up the year!! Can't wait!!). The boyfriend does nothing outside of school and work. He either hangs around the apt till it's time to go to school or after school (at 12PM) he will go party with friends for a bit. They both work, right now only on weekends, but again the opposite shifts. Once they are both out of school, they will be working full time, again opposite shifts. Not much will change. They are going to try and coordinate with their jobs to have the same days off. I am worried about my easy child. She had to start taking an antidepressant a couple of months ago - depression which I think was caused by lack of sleep, the winter blues, all this stress, and all the changes that took place. I think she bit off more than can chew (as did the boyfriend). As we all know, they likely had different expectations about living together and perhaps now they aren't so thrilled with the way things panned out. Anyway, easy child stopped taking the AD's when she 'felt better' and then told me that the boyfriend commented that he's "tired of her long face and of her being tired all the time". Hmmm, I know he's young, but 'way to be supportive'. She started taking the AD's again at my prodding. She is due for her annual physical in early July and I want to encourage her to speak with the DR about all these issues. I really think it's all linked and if I say as much, she may not share as much with me, but if the DR comments similarly, perhaps she will. She was recently offered a position as Ambassador for her school, which would entail her traveling throughout the country (at their expense) and speaking on behalf of her school, doing demonstrations and workshops. With this position she would be eligible for not only monetary compensation, but a FREE dormroom. I am hoping she takes it. I'd love to see her back on campus and on her own. I like the boyfriend, but I think he's adding to her stress. And I know my easy child; when things get too stressful, she has a tendency to run herself ragged and eventually cut everyone off, then flee the situation. She recently half heartedly mentioned that she thinks she and the boyfriend need counseling....? They have never been together steadily for more than a few months at a time. Why they thought living together would make them stronger, I will never know. Anyway, any thoughts or ideas would be helpful. Thanks for 'listening'. It's hard when they are at this age. Please just send out some goood healing vibes!