I am new to the forum, and could have posted the exact question. My son appears to function quite well "outside" of the home, but at home is another story alltogether. His therapist believes that since he can control himself outside, he is using defiance and manipulation at home to try to get what he wants. His friends and peers would never accept his behavior, and therefore he's able to maintain composure in that setting. At home, however, he thinks he can manipulate any situation. We have had problems for almost a year... and no - he was never a perfect child, but certainly nothing like we are seeing now with puberty, hormones, and experimenting with pot/alcohol. He has been diagnosis with ODD, and is awaiting further testing.