Back to normal again (whatever that is...haha)


Well-Known Member
After the shock of realizing you-know-who was reading all my posts, and responding to her (although not in a nasty way nor did I call her names) on her own site and texting her once (not in a nice way), I woke up feeling back to normal. Since I do have a mood disorder, I have to be mindful of how I respond to surprises and take myself out of the drama as soon as I realize I've gotten too involved.

I'm glad I spoke the truth, as I know it, on her forum. I am also glad that I found out that she is even sicker and more dangerous to anyone she knows than I thought. SHe has hurt everyone in our family at some time...few are left in our family and they are free to do what they want. That is not my concern. She always needs somebody (Mom, now bro) to back up what she thinks.

Hereafter, I am on radio silence.

I will not check her site again, Guardian Angel's advice or not, as I know the worst and it doesn't change anything in my life.

My i-phone blocks texts. I will do that.

Dad will not bring her or him up to me. He's pretty good that way.

When he is gone, that will be the total last of DNA collection in my life...ever.

If Sis still wants to read about the good life I have or the way I experienced our family, hey, she is free to do it. I'm not going to find out about it either way nor am I going to allow her to censor what I say. She is a molecule in my life right now. Vile. Vengeful. Full of hate, a lot of it toward herself as shown by how she treats herself, her body, how she picks her boyfriends...I tried to help her out. I'm done caring. All I can say is I hope she turns it around, but I won't know either way.

Bro will have to call my hubby when Dad...I don't even like to write it. I don't want Bro to be the one to give me that sad news. My husband is sweet and kind and will take my hands and tell me in a compassionate way. Then we can decide whether to attend the formal funeral or to drive down later or the next day and say good-bye on our own, without sharp eyes to distract from the true meaning of our visit.

Dad did not sound good last night. I got off and felt tears in my eyes. He asked me to buy something from him for Junior and send him the bill and it was a generous amount of money. Junior needs to at least talk to his great-grandfather before...and I will make that happen. I wish Dad had Skype. Junior is a sweet, smart boy who Dad would instantly like.

The focus will remain, now until forever, 99% on my real wonderful husband (bless his soul), my four terrific kids, my grands, my puppies and my kitty. No matter what anybody calls me, or wants to think I am like, nobody can take my blessings away from me.

I have walked a long road and have had many letdowns and triumphs and the triumphs have won out.

Ok, now to look outside to see if the SNOW in St. Louis is gone yet. The last thing I wanted to see down here is SNOW. But it's going to warm up and I will be able to take a walk along the hilly grounds with the mountains in the background. St. Louis rocks!!!!!!
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Scent of Cedar *

Well-Known Member
Perhaps it was your guardian angel after all.

It was time for you to work through those old beliefs about yourself.

I am happy and proud for you.

You came through with flying colors, and can never be hurt in those exact ways ~ not by the sister, and not by anyone else either, again.

All those places that were twisted into roles are open now, no more vulnerability, energy pumping through, revitalizing everything.





Well-Known Member
Cedar, I believe it was, after all.

You've been a wonderful friend and helpmate. Now I need to continue somewhere that has security. Unfortunately, that sort of behavior is not just going to stop.

Hugs!!!! :)