difficult child and I headed out on what usually takes about 2 hours to see my parents today. We planned on making it a day trip - to visit a few hours and head back. I was a little concerned about the roads but packed clothes to stay over two nights if need be. We drove about 10 miles out of town and I did not feel comfortable going over 45 miles per hour so I called mom and told her that we would not be coming. We have a snowstorm coming tonight and I didn't want to face driving back tomorrow or Wednesday following a snowstorm.
When we got back to town, we went to church to find out when the funeral was that I was asked to help with. Each group serves about once or twice a year if even that so I try to help out when it is my turn if I can. It was a 1:00 funeral but there were three ladies there at 9:30 setting tables, ect. so difficult child and I stayed to help. They were surprised and happy to see us.
Once difficult child started helping, he started, on his own, looking and asking for ways to help and was FANTASTIC! He helped set dishes on the 17 tables, filled the pickle dishes, covered the plates of buns, put water on the table, filled the coffee pots with hot water, played host for many of the tables, helped clear dirty dishes, helped put table and chairs away, and helped me turn down the dishwasher. I could just tell he felt so grown up helping out - especially when he was the only one who could open the pickle jar.
difficult child kept watch for when the funeral ended to give us the cue to uncover the cake and sandwich platters. At one point he did say he felt weird because he was bored so he was looking for ways to keep busy to keep from getting bored. Boredom is about the most noticeable trigger to his anxiety.
One of the older ladies gave difficult child a hug and several kept telling him how they were so glad he was there to help. When we were just about done with the clean up, the lady in charge told difficult child that if he ever wanted a job, any of the kitchen ladies would love to have him help them and then made an announcement that difficult child helped so much, let's give him a hand so everyone clapped for him. He looked very pleased with himself.
The funeral home had three funerals today so called on a hearse driver from another town to come help. The driver happened to come from my parent's town. He said the roads were very clear until just before the town we had turned around at. So, if I had gone 5 more miles (giving it one more town to decide) we would have gone to my parents! Even though visiting my parents is very important, I think today it was o.k. that we didn't make it there. What a great self esteem grower for difficult child to be involved with.
When we got back to town, we went to church to find out when the funeral was that I was asked to help with. Each group serves about once or twice a year if even that so I try to help out when it is my turn if I can. It was a 1:00 funeral but there were three ladies there at 9:30 setting tables, ect. so difficult child and I stayed to help. They were surprised and happy to see us.
Once difficult child started helping, he started, on his own, looking and asking for ways to help and was FANTASTIC! He helped set dishes on the 17 tables, filled the pickle dishes, covered the plates of buns, put water on the table, filled the coffee pots with hot water, played host for many of the tables, helped clear dirty dishes, helped put table and chairs away, and helped me turn down the dishwasher. I could just tell he felt so grown up helping out - especially when he was the only one who could open the pickle jar.
difficult child kept watch for when the funeral ended to give us the cue to uncover the cake and sandwich platters. At one point he did say he felt weird because he was bored so he was looking for ways to keep busy to keep from getting bored. Boredom is about the most noticeable trigger to his anxiety.
One of the older ladies gave difficult child a hug and several kept telling him how they were so glad he was there to help. When we were just about done with the clean up, the lady in charge told difficult child that if he ever wanted a job, any of the kitchen ladies would love to have him help them and then made an announcement that difficult child helped so much, let's give him a hand so everyone clapped for him. He looked very pleased with himself.
The funeral home had three funerals today so called on a hearse driver from another town to come help. The driver happened to come from my parent's town. He said the roads were very clear until just before the town we had turned around at. So, if I had gone 5 more miles (giving it one more town to decide) we would have gone to my parents! Even though visiting my parents is very important, I think today it was o.k. that we didn't make it there. What a great self esteem grower for difficult child to be involved with.