difficult child is all over the place.

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Shari, Apr 7, 2008.

  1. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Wow. I'm not even sure what else to say.

    We've had bad days at school here and there, but we're starting in on week #2. This isn't a day, this is a run of days.

    Last Monday he refused to do any work at school. Tuesday he chewed holes thru several t-shirts. Wednesday was the evaluation, which obviously wasn't a picnic. Thursday was the day from you know where, when he kicked kids, bit teachers, spit on people, and threw shoes for 4 hours and had to be restrained at school. He chewed holes thru at least 2 shirts a day every day but Thursday, and on Thursday, he didn't touch his shirt to his mouth at all during the entire day.

    This morning was a nightmare getting him to school. He cried, earnest, heartbroken crying. It started that he wanted to buy Lego's with his birthday money. Then it was that he didn't want to go to school, no one liked him, they say he stinks. Then it was his brother didn't love him. I don't know the real reason, but whatever it was, his heart was truly broken. For an hour.

    Today at school, he and another teacher had it out most of the day. I picked him up to a 20 minute lecture from teacher (which made him late to BT) about all he needed was consistency and firmness. Oh that gets my goose...

    We got to BT 10 minutes late, had a good session, and came home. He fell asleep almost instantly. Went to the inlaws for dinner, I woke him, and he was shaking like crazy. Inside, he wet his pants. Got his clothes changed and he was cold. I gave him a blanket and realized he was HOT. Borrowed a thermometer and took his temp - 103.5 AXILLARY! Yikes. Needles to say, I took my dinner to go.

    Gave him Advil which took the temp to 102 axillary, and he obviously felt better. We played Candy Land. He was great.

    Later he was playing Lego's so I worked on a project for the school fund raiser. He decided he wanted to make one, too, for his friend in the hospital. Except he wanted to do it NOW and we didn't have anything to make it out of. So it started that he wanted to use any scrap we could find that just plain wouldn't work. I refused to argue and ignored, to which he grabbed his scissors and threatened to cut up some stuff...pieces of fabric, so it wouldn't have been the end of the world, but ignoring that will lead to a bigger infraction that you can't ignore, so I took the scissors. He refused to give them up and for a very brief moment, pointed them to me. When I got the scissors, I walked out of the room and he followed, yelling he was sorry and begging me to still love him... I said "of course I love you, I just don't like it when you act like this - we have to wait until we have the PARTS to make this project" - and this is somehow about me loving him or not?

    Obviously he's sick. He's usually an angel when he's sick, however, this time, he's flippin' crazy. He's not even making any sense.
  2. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Has he been tested for strep? Strep can have an effect on anxiety.
  3. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    I'd bet his behavior earlier in the week was due to whatever bug he's got starting to ramp up inside him -- poor guy! Hope whatever this is, that he kicks it quickly and settles down soon.
  4. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Yikes!!! You know K just got over being sick and I could follow her amping up to the sickness... she was out of her mind. I didn't realize it at the time!!! She has been doing horribly but then it got even worse!!! She got sick for a couple of days, she was nice the one day she was really sick!!! Then back to mania...
    I hope he is feeling better, hang in there. It is so hard when they are sick. you want to enforce the rules, but they are so destabilized.
  5. Christy

    Christy New Member

    Hope things are settling down. I am sure not feeling well helped to fuel his fire in more ways than just the fever. How's difficult child feeling today?

    Take care of yourself!
  6. ChefPaula1965

    ChefPaula1965 Oh my aching back!!

    Oh Shari,
    I am so sorry you are going through this... managing a young child is very difficult.
    The thing about still loving him did not strike me as odd... I think that (personal opinion) kids often use the "I'm not your friend any more" ... and frequently (even my easy child kids do this) equal being upset with- some one as not loving them any more...
    This is a childhood mistery to me... but I know that this is something that I see many kids doing..
    hope this helps..
    Big hugs..
  7. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    I dragged him to the doctor and asked for a strep test, despite having any real strep symptoms. Positive again. Second time in a month.


    What is it with the infections this year! This kid has only ever had one ear infection in his life, he's been sick half the year this winter...

    We have antibiotics. Hopefully it kicks it. He's still crazy.
  8. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    I only play a doctor on the internet. :sheepish:

    Hope he feels (and acts) better soon.
  9. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Not to alarm you, but strep has been proven to be the culprit of psychiatric issues in susceptible people. My difficult child 2 is one of those lucky few, and developed Sydenham's chorea and what looked like Early Onset Bi-Polar (EOBP) because of a past strep infection. In his case, the symptoms didn't appear for nearly a year and a half, but his neurologist feels pretty confident in his diagnosis because of the timing of his symptoms' onset. Someone else here has posted about PANDAS (sorry can't remember who), which is another strep-related diagnosis that is gaining acceptance, albeit slowly, in the medical community. It all boils down to immune-dysfunction in the wake of infection, and the unfortunate target is the brain.
  10. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

  11. BestICan

    BestICan This community rocks.

    Just wanted to send hugs.

    My difficult child's behavior goes off the wall the day or so before he gets ill. Of course you can never make the connection until after the fact! Also, keep in mind that some antibiotics have behavioral side effects. If your difficult child seems to be extra revved up, you may want to ask to switch to an antibiotic that doesn't have CNS Excitability (Is that right?) as a listed side effect. Both my difficult child and easy child can go off the wall when they're taking antibiotics.

    Good luck, sorry things are so hard!
  12. slsh

    slsh member since 1999

    Goodness - I hope difficult child recovers quickly. I think it was Vicki (Jungleland's) daughter who used to really rev up when she was getting sick. thank you usually turned into a complete angel.

    Had to chuckle at the teacher's comments only because we've been there done that. We had one who was very smug and superior at intake IEP, actually had the nerve to tell me "*my* students *respect* me". I just smiled and said "that's wonderful" and waited. Didn't take long for thank you to set her straight, LOL. I felt sorry for her when she came back a month later with tail between her legs, asking for suggestions. We parents really do know what we're talking about (sometimes). ;)

    Hope your week gets better!!