Yeah- Mr. Behavior Contract: Mom will cook more meals difficult child likes - difficult child won't break law anymore. We'll give up difficult child's regular, private therapist and just use the MST.
Sure.
From what I'm gathering and still trying to get a clearer picture about because I've never known someone well who has had a long-term incarceration (well, they consider this time long for a kid difficult child's age); apparently it is typical for incarcerated people to have that battle in their mind where one side wants to do what they have to in order to make sure they never get incarcerated again and they are helped (in Department of Juvenile Justice) to form constructive goals and plans for release; the other side of the mind is the one where all the incarcerated people are sitting there talking to each other day in and out about all they've done, how to get by with things, what they want to do the minute the gates are unlocked (and it's not the good goals), etc.
I'm being told it is normal upoon release to still have that battle going on and in difficult child's case, he gave into the wrong side pretty early on. (They don't think the other side was never there, but I'd say that will become clear pretty soon whether or not it ever was.) I have been told that this battle is harder for kids than adults for a variety of reasons, including immaturity, less developed coping skills, transition of a parental type of authority (example- difficult child no longer has a guard over him- but he can listen to PO or the judge who tells him to go back- or he can listen to his parent/guardian and not have to deal with PO/judge- sounds easy, but it's not once that authority has been stripped and transitioned), etc.
This is where the mentor comes in- 1) he discusses those good goals and plans with difficult child in order to help difficult child stay focused on that side, 2) he helps difficult child have conversations and do "normal" things with people in the community who aren't incarcerated difficult child's, 3) he helps difficult child pursue whichever goals and plans on difficult child's release list/plan that he can. Of course, difficult child should feel good when discussing and pursuing these things. So, in this respect, I am feeling better about this because I think it has a better chance of working IF difficult child has that side in him and wants it developed, than solely a mentor focused on behavior mod, which difficult child would have gotten if his therapist in Department of Juvenile Justice hadn't recommended a therapeutic one to PO. I didn't like that therapist for family therapy but I think she did help difficult child with a few tools and difficult child had confided in her that he was tempted to do drugs when he got out.
I'm going to back this effort up- after all- there is only so much that can be done right now and we might as well try it. Also, I noticed several people have reminded difficult child lately that he's at a fork in the road- he has to choose which path to follow- he can't do both like he's tried and he better get his head on straight NOW. Since I am FINALLY seeing a few different people in/from the system saying consistent things, I'm thinking there must be some validity to that battle in the brain being typical for those recently released. That doesn't mean I think difficult child just made an honest mistake- I get that he went down the wrong path.
Right now I'm just happy that since Sunday, difficult child apparently decided he had dug himself in deep enough and better stop. He sure wasn't at that point last week. Yeah, this is pretty minor but when I say "difficult child", I mean it. LOL!! Right now I'm thinking about all the time wasted on medication changes in the past due to thinking this was mania. (Not that this statement would apply to all difficult child's- I'm sure it wouldn't.)
Even though difficult child might blow it all, I am glad that PO is making every effort to transition difficult child appropriately it appears, given what the law and funding allows. I guess I'd call it a tough love approach and difficult child did need that from a male and supposedly responded well to it in Department of Juvenile Justice. He sure didn't respond well to it last Thursday so I don't think difficult child should push that any further because PO was none too happy about it.
Apparently difficult child did consider running away but after spending that 3 hours sleeping outside early Sun. morning and thinking it thru more later that day, he decided he didn't want to be homeless.
