difficult child Is Staying In Orchestera!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Bunny, Dec 20, 2010.

  1. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    I posted last week that difficult child suddenly wanted to quit orchestra. Just out of the blue, "Hey mom, I want to quit." Huh? Where did that come from?

    So, after working closely with the guidance counselor at school, difficult child finally admitted to the GC that he got a "really bad grade" (or what difficult child considers to be a really bad grade) on a test in language arts and felt that orchestra lessons were starting to cause problems with his school work. So, the GC and difficult child worked out that difficult child will not have to go to violin lessons during the periods that he has language arts. When lessons fall during those periods, he will not go to the lesson, but at lunch he will eat and then head over to the orchestra room to practice.

    I am really happy that he made this choice. It was what I had hoped for. If he had insisted that he drop orchestra I was not going to insist that he keep going, but at least he is going to stick with it through the end of the school year.

  2. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Well done!!! :)
  3. svengandhi

    svengandhi Well-Known Member

    I'm also on the island. I let my easy child daughter quit orchestra in grade 9. She also complained about the sectionals, which always seemed to be scheduled for her math periods (her weakest area). She then switched to chorus but dropped that because the kids weren't serious about singing. She went to choir which was a before school activity where the teacher let them do sectionals whenever they had time as long as they gave him notice. She also refused to take music theory. Fast forward a few years - she's in college studying Special Education with a music concentration and thinking about doing the major, which involves about 4 extra courses. She doesn't regret dropping orchestra (she was one of 4 cellists, the other three of whom had private lessons that I couldn't afford for my daughter so they were better) but she is sorry she didn't do music theory. She just got her grade back and she had an A-, which is great but she really struggled with it. She's actually thinking of taking a cello course at some point as well.

    Her quitting orchestra was not a difficult child thing because she's always been a easy child.

    I'm glad that your GC was able to work out a solution. So often, it's just a matter of figuring out what the problem is and finding a simple solution.
  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Yay, Pam and difficult child! Great teamwork.
    It is amazing, how black and white and dead-end our kids' thinking is. We adults are so used to problem solving that it's hard to see life through their eyes. Great job!
  5. Jena

    Jena New Member

    great job!!! :)
  6. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    That's a really valuable compromise. It also teaches difficult child how to work out a compromise, and problem-solve.

    Well done! Kudos to difficult child, and to the GC.