Loony Smurf
Member
I'm not terribly surprised to be posting this one. my 7 yr old has always been a wild independent one. Fixing his own microwaved eggs at 2, trying to walk to the store to buy candy at 6 am alone at 3, pretty much convinced he can do whatever cause he's just that smart lol. He's always been a handful, and quite hyper and moody. up until a couple years ago he'd Literally bounce off the walls. He's not so bad now, we got a treadmill and he gets a lot of outside time. he shows a lot of signs of ADHD, yet his moodiness...dunno if it's the age or what but he goes from happy and laughing to 'i hate my life, i should just die, why do you hate me? when i tell him no on something or he doesnt get his way or whatever he doesnt like. oh and lets not forget the 'then i'll NEVER do it' if i tell him he has to wait. He gets Really mad, lashes out at whoever's closest, and if nobody is then he settles for things like ripping the bedding off his bed, throwing things down the stairs, screaming at the top of his lungs, trying to kick a hole in the wall (hurts him more than the wall) or knocking things around the room. After a few minutes alone, he's all calm again and apologetic and ready to get back to life as usual, quite calm and happy. I also hear a lot out of him 'i'm too hyper' when i ask him to settle down and stop running or jumping around, he'll happily get on the treadmill and set it to 10 mph and run 1/4 mile a few times a day.
He used to do ok in school. always has had trouble sitting still, but the teachers just managed to make it work for them having him run errands a lot. Preschool and kindergarten weren't too bad. I got a few 'he got in trouble today cause he wouldnt sit still during xxx' or he just wasnt listening today...but he's always liked school and been basically cooperative.
Last year his life was thrown into flux, his dad and i split up for 6 months and we went to stay with my parents in UT. My dad was horrid to him, abusive, so he had to go stay with his dad's parents a few hours away, switching back and forth between his paternal gparents several times a month with his dad only there a couple days every couple weeks. very unstable, for the last 3 months of the school year. He'd started having behavior problems more at my folks' place, but at his dad's parents, he Really had, trouble. Refusing to do much of anything, even so far as just plain refusing to go to school, having to be carried in, and him taking off out of the school.
Things went SO bad with this arrangement for everyone that I ended up deciding things were better with Dex and moving them back here to IL. Things got Much worse here however, with Dex terrorizing me worse and worse, until he was finally arrested in July and i got a order of protection against him for me and the kids. The divorce was just finalized, and the kids have only occassionally spoken on the phone since then. He hasnt even tried to do the things he needs to to see them again, just went on with his life.
So, at the beginning of this year, difficult child 3 wasnt doing too bad honestly. He was enjoying school, although still having trouble sitting still and following directions. Things at home changed, got more stable and a lot less abusive without Dex around. He was going to bed better, not fighting as much with the other kids. But then, he stopped eating well, got harder to wake in the mornings, got more easily upset. Then i started getting phone calls from his teacher, he's refusing to do his work, jumping and climbing all over the room and driving everyone crazy, refusing to listen to the teacher. She had to call the janitor to drag him out from under the tables a couple times. I figured at first that it was just readjusting after christmas break, but it's been a worsening problem since then, apparently nearly every day now. It's usually only in his regular classroom, however the other teachers sometimes have days where he's just not cooperating with anything, ending up in trouble and missing recess.
Today, I got his 3rd quarter report card. His teacher has written on it that he only really acts up like that when he's supposed to write something. He'll sit there and throw his paper around, scribble on it, slide off his chair under the desk, anything but write. He says it's just not fun, it's boring. I asked the teacher if she thought he has a writing problem and she says 'oh no, he just doesnt want to do it. he can when he wants to. He just wants the attention, likes being the class clown'
Honestly, I dont know. my other 2 difficult children are both i Sped for writing problems. I admit sometimes he really can just plain be difficult and defiant and rebellious. Quite often actually. But he's to the point of trying to refuse to go to school again. Nothing's changed at home in months, He's started seeing a therapist but he doesnt talk to him very well yet.
So, i guess i need to ask for an IEP evaluation. I'm in IL, i know they can be kinda difficult here. and with only 2 months of school left, I'm not sure they will even do it right now. I'm on Medicaid, and dont really have any income atm since Dex has decided to be a deadbeat and refuse to pay anything.
So, how's the best way to handle this do you think?
He used to do ok in school. always has had trouble sitting still, but the teachers just managed to make it work for them having him run errands a lot. Preschool and kindergarten weren't too bad. I got a few 'he got in trouble today cause he wouldnt sit still during xxx' or he just wasnt listening today...but he's always liked school and been basically cooperative.
Last year his life was thrown into flux, his dad and i split up for 6 months and we went to stay with my parents in UT. My dad was horrid to him, abusive, so he had to go stay with his dad's parents a few hours away, switching back and forth between his paternal gparents several times a month with his dad only there a couple days every couple weeks. very unstable, for the last 3 months of the school year. He'd started having behavior problems more at my folks' place, but at his dad's parents, he Really had, trouble. Refusing to do much of anything, even so far as just plain refusing to go to school, having to be carried in, and him taking off out of the school.
Things went SO bad with this arrangement for everyone that I ended up deciding things were better with Dex and moving them back here to IL. Things got Much worse here however, with Dex terrorizing me worse and worse, until he was finally arrested in July and i got a order of protection against him for me and the kids. The divorce was just finalized, and the kids have only occassionally spoken on the phone since then. He hasnt even tried to do the things he needs to to see them again, just went on with his life.
So, at the beginning of this year, difficult child 3 wasnt doing too bad honestly. He was enjoying school, although still having trouble sitting still and following directions. Things at home changed, got more stable and a lot less abusive without Dex around. He was going to bed better, not fighting as much with the other kids. But then, he stopped eating well, got harder to wake in the mornings, got more easily upset. Then i started getting phone calls from his teacher, he's refusing to do his work, jumping and climbing all over the room and driving everyone crazy, refusing to listen to the teacher. She had to call the janitor to drag him out from under the tables a couple times. I figured at first that it was just readjusting after christmas break, but it's been a worsening problem since then, apparently nearly every day now. It's usually only in his regular classroom, however the other teachers sometimes have days where he's just not cooperating with anything, ending up in trouble and missing recess.
Today, I got his 3rd quarter report card. His teacher has written on it that he only really acts up like that when he's supposed to write something. He'll sit there and throw his paper around, scribble on it, slide off his chair under the desk, anything but write. He says it's just not fun, it's boring. I asked the teacher if she thought he has a writing problem and she says 'oh no, he just doesnt want to do it. he can when he wants to. He just wants the attention, likes being the class clown'
Honestly, I dont know. my other 2 difficult children are both i Sped for writing problems. I admit sometimes he really can just plain be difficult and defiant and rebellious. Quite often actually. But he's to the point of trying to refuse to go to school again. Nothing's changed at home in months, He's started seeing a therapist but he doesnt talk to him very well yet.
So, i guess i need to ask for an IEP evaluation. I'm in IL, i know they can be kinda difficult here. and with only 2 months of school left, I'm not sure they will even do it right now. I'm on Medicaid, and dont really have any income atm since Dex has decided to be a deadbeat and refuse to pay anything.
So, how's the best way to handle this do you think?
