Hi everyone. I have been away from the board for a while but the roller coaster has not slowed down at all. difficult child was diagnosed Major Depressive Disorder - moderate in August. The psychiatrist said he could possibly be bipolar but that we would have to wait and see. He tried Ciprolex for about a month and then went into a major depressive state very quickly and was threatening suicide at school. The school called the police and he was held in hospital on a 72 hour psychiatric hold. While he was there they changed his medication to 300mg of Wellbutrin. Partly because it has been shown to have some benefits for ADHD as well as depression and partly because he refused to take the Ciprolex any longer. He ended up staying in the hospital for 5 days (not including the day he was admitted). He spent the first couple of days blaming me for everything, including his being there. Then he read the book "Life Strategies for Teens" by Jay McGraw and it seemed as though a light went on his head. He completely changed his attitude. Apologized to me for all the trouble he'd caused, realized it was his responsibility, etc. etc.. He came home from the hospital and said he was going to change things in his life. Great! Yippee!! Cautiously hoping he meant it. So, we signed him up for guitar and voice lessons. Dealt with his suspension from school (he was carrying a knife) and moved forward. I decided to go back to the beginning and take things slower with difficult child. He really needs to start taking responsibility for things in his life - anything. So, we went back to just asking the basics of him. No internet in your room, no food in your room, pick up your dirty clothes and put them in the laundry, go to school. I thought if I could get him into the habit of doing these small things and being successful with them then we could have some positives for him and he would continue to improve. So, I gently prodded him to pick up his things, reminded him about the internet rules, woke him up so he wouldn't miss the bus......... After an entire week of asking him daily to pick up his clothes and him not doing it I told him we needed to have a conversation about this because it was becoming a problem. He went ballistic on me. Screaming, carrying on, swearing, yelling at me, refusing to come home (it was a Thursday night), informing me that I could come and pick him up on Saturday, just way out of control. This was the first time since he'd came home that he'd been called on anything - and he immediately reverted to his old ways so he'd obviously learned nothing. Now, I know dirty laundry is not the end of the world. What I have a huge problem with is him not taking any responsibility and the total lack of respect he has for me. The next day he tried to bully me into doing something for him but I refused. I gave him plenty of opportunity to apologize for his previous behaviour and he wouldn't. He just kept escalating and trying to bully me into doing what he wanted at the exact time he wanted it. Then he told me to f'off and he wasn't coming home. I didn't see him again until Sunday at which time he got an earful from me and he apologized, acted very remorseful and said he really wanted to do better. After which he immediately resumed his previous irresponsible behaviour. He is failing/nearly failing every course. He has skipped at least a dozen times in the last 6 weeks. He left the house on Friday, came home Sunday, went to school on Tuesday and hasn't come home since. He quite obviously does not want to be parented any longer in any way shape or form. Since he started guitar and vocal lessons 2 weeks ago he has spent all of 30 minute practicing for both. They cost me $70 a week. I am exhausted. This nonsense has been going on for a year. He used to be a pretty easy kid and a good student. I don't know who he is anymore. I am constantly asking "What should I do?" So many people ask me why we haven't kicked him out already. Then I look at other parents and I see how they are sticking it out longer and through some things that are worse than what we are going through. I just don't have the answer. He is 16. He is so young but I have zero control over him. Under the law I can not send him to any special school, can not force him to go to school, he can move out if he chooses. He will not be disciplined, has stolen from us and his sister, follows none of the rules. I feel like I am so close to just telling him he needs to find somewhere else to live. husband is only holding out for me. It kills me to make this decision. What if I'm making it too soon and he's going to come out of this and mature and get better? What if instead of maturing and getting better he gets worse out on his own and ends up in more trouble? I'm terrified to make this decision but I almost feel like I have to in order to save the peace in our home, my health and the rest of our family. My question is: How did you know it was time for them to go? How did you make peace with it?