How much more drama can one family take?

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by gcvmom, Dec 20, 2007.

  1. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Okay, this is a vent and a pity party, so you've been warned. :sad:

    I posted earlier about difficult child 1 and his stealing and lying that we saw therapist about on Monday. And his little hissy fit that lost him his bedroom door...

    Then on Wednesday, difficult child 2 got a 2-day suspension for bringing a pocket knife to school and saying something really stupid about what he "could" do with it to someone. :faint:

    And TODAY, we learned that husband has, in fact, been having seizures for 5 years and that they're due to a vascular malformation in his right temporal lobe and it's more than TRIPLED in size since '04... so now he needs BRAIN surgery! This is on top of his compulsive gambling problem this year with thousands of dollars LOST, compulsive sex issues, ADHD, depression, anxiety, and hmmm, what else can we throw at him besides epilepsy? Mood disorder? Why NOT?!

    Week from hell? I think it's right up there in the top five for our family.

    Can anyone say :bah-humbug:

    This concludes my sorry little pity party and vent.

    Thanks for listening! :bow:
  2. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Definitely not a fun week at your house. I'm sorry about husband.

    Seriously you need to be taking care of yourself through all of this. Be nice to you, take a bubble bath, buy a new book, go for a walk. It's important when you are under this kind of stress.

    I'm praying you have a much better week ahead. :angel:
  3. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    I'm sorry to hear about husband's illness. That one crept up on you. The difficult child stuff is never ending - you just didn't need it this week.

    I'll be keeping your family in my thoughts.

    Please, if you can, find some alone time today. Be gentle with yourself. :flower:
  4. wakeupcall

    wakeupcall Well-Known Member

    It will be important to focus on your husband right now. Like Linda said, the difficult child stuff is just difficult child stuff....that stuff would be a major problem if we weren't used to dealing with it, but we are warrior moms. Save your energy as much as you can to help your husband through this medical crisis. I'll pray everyone will be fine.
  5. KFld

    KFld New Member

    Oh boy, I certainly feel for you. I can relate to the husband with adhd and compulsive sex issues, as I've been there and done that with my s2bx. I've always dealt with issues like your difficult child 1 is throwing at you right now when my difficult child was much younger. None of it is easy.

    I will keep you in my prayers that your husband has a safe and successful surgery. When will this be taking place???

    I know it's hard, but do try and find some time for yourself right now. I think you are going to need it in order to deal with all the other stuff in the proper way.

    I'll be thinking about you!!!
  6. Kjs

    Kjs Guest

    I'm sorry. Hang in there. One day at a time. My pity party was last week.. total melt down. Thanks to all the support from you guys, I am over the melt down.

    Kids are just not so bright are they. As far as brining the pocket knife. Not quite as serious, but there are no camera phones allowed on school property. They all have them, but really aren't allowed. difficult child took his new phone to school to show everyone on Monday. I told him don't get caught. His reply..."They can't search me". Oh...they can. He doesn't believe me.

    You will be fine. After all you are a strong, strong person.
  7. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member

    Sorry to hear about DHs need for brain surgery. Perhaps the reason for the compulsiveness? Maybe it solves 2 problems.

    Everyone is right - be good to yourself!

  8. slsh

    slsh member since 1999

    Good heavens! Guess 2007 decided to go out memorably?? :smile:

    I do think Busy has an excellent point, though. Perhaps some of his behavioral issues are directly related to this new finding.

    Please do take good care of yourself. And vent away - we're here to support as best we can, hon.

    A gentle hug to you.
  9. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member

    Yeah, I was thinking the same thing....Perhaps this is the root of his compulsiveness and hopefully, the surgery will be a blessing. Sending hugs and good wishes.
  10. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    You are going through a lot right now. Pity parties and whines certainly allowed. Have as many of both as you need. We'll listen and whine right along with you.

    Let's hope the surgery proves successful and helps with other issues.

    Wishing you all the best.
  11. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    {{gcvmom}} Oh Jeez! Sending you lots and lots of extra warm gentle hugs! I sure hope that H makes it through the surgery okay and comes our a better man for it. :angel:

    Like everyone else has said, the difficult child stuff? It is what it is - doesn't make it easier to deal with, but your focus will most certainly be on H at this time.

    Make sure you take a moment each day to focus only on you. I'm so sorry that all this is happening at the same exact time!! :flower:
  12. ck1

    ck1 New Member answer to your question about how much more drama one family can more, that's enough!!! I'm sorry you're dealing with so much at one time. Each one seems that it needs you're undivided attention, but you're only one person. You must take care of yourself and then do the best you can with everything else on your plate. I agree with the others, obviously, your husband's health issues need to be a priority. Hopefully your g'sfg will step up and help out.

    You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. Stay strong, you will get through this!!
  13. Star*

    Star* call 911

    I am so sorry but in retrospect - I would advise you to not ask!

    I too think Busy had a great point. And Timers advice of being gentle on yourself is very good and much needed.

    Many hugs and smiles being sent to you and kleenex - the really soft ones that have lotion in them for comfort.

    You vent away whenever you need it because those of us who have had to be strong for so long need time to just be - soft as a horses nose and not have to answer for it.

  14. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Many hugs!
  15. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Thank you EVERYONE for the warm-hearted replies! :flower:

    husband did some reading last night and today, and I think he's understanding his condition a little better and calming down a bit. Still not happy about this, but able to accept what's on his plate and move forward. He broke the news to his parents this evening, so I'm sure our phone will be ringing off the hook over the next few days when the rest of the clan find out!

    We've already got two neurosurgical consults scheduled for January, so the ball is officially rolling. I just have to round up reports and imaging studies next week so we can take them on the road. And he starts his anti-seizure medications tonight.

    The difficult child stuff by itself is tolerable... it's just a little maddening when so much crud hits the fan in such a short period of time! I'm not going to stress over the holidays one bit -- made the decision months ago to forego the annual family letter and cards, and I'm not hosting ANYTHING this year, so this will be much easier on me than years past.

    Our winter break has officially started, and not a moment too soon! I think we're all going to hibernate for a while... lighting a fire tonight, putting on jammies and slippers, making a cup of tea, maybe watching a movie with the kids. :thumbsup:

    It is SO nice to know there are people like you all out there!

    Happy Holidays!
  16. wakeupcall

    wakeupcall Well-Known Member

    Glad you are going to take it easy for a few hours. Tomorrow is another day....
  17. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest


    When it rains, it pours. So sorry. My thoughts are with you.