Just need to let some feelings out ,posting is my therapy. I’m having such a hard time dealing with this & now that my sons phone is broke it’s even harder. There’s absolutely no contact which kills me. I took a workout class today but the whole time, my mind was thinking about my son. I feel like at any moment I can just break down & cry & I have many times alone in the shower. I want to tell my husband I’m not ok , but I don’t know why I can’t . It makes me mad that he doesn't even ask , maybe he’s tired of this cycle every few months , I don’t know . I feel like nothing makes me feel better , of course I smile & laugh at home with my 2 younger kids but inside I’m dying . I just needed to let this out , I feel so alone but I know I have everyone here .