I am sorry that I have not been posting (update)

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by totoro, Jan 15, 2008.

  1. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    It aint fun is it? They make you jump through hoops, they are trying to make people realize it is not a FREE ride... and not abuse the system.
    I took the bus through some of the worse parts of SFO to get denied food stamps, get denied food... get denied anything... I made 30$ over the amount... I lived with 3 other people but could not afford college... But you know what? I had no car either, a tree fell on it! I had hookers and drug addicts hitting me up on every corner... but you know what I got to know them... and I became friends with them... and I gave a couple of bucks every couple of days... could I afford it? NO... did they like what they where doing? NO. Where they better then me? NO...

    The whole situation made me realize I was so close to the bottom and I was no better than anyone and who was I to complain? I was asking for a handout, I would do whatever I could to better myself... I got a bike... from a second hand store, and biked my butt to interviews anywhere. I ended up working at a party supply store were the customers spoke mostly spanish! But you know what? I ended up loving it!!! I made 7$ an hour... was broke... but learned a lot. It got me out of the situation.

    I am not saying you have to do the same thing, but you have to DIG deep and do things you never thought you would or could... you might be amazed!!!
    I was!!!

    I am not trying to make you feel bad I know you are struggling... and I wish things were easier for you but you have to keep fighting!!!
  2. mrscatinthehat

    mrscatinthehat Seussical

    Sorry you are feeling so down. I was just thinking I hadn't seen you in a while and I am glad to see you back.

  3. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Sweetie, don't ever be ashamed to take cash assistance from the county. Your taxes paid for that assistance to be there for YOU and everyone else. You deserve to have it when times are rough.

    You're not abusing the system. You have nothing to feel ashamed about.

    Job searching can be horrible and frustrating. Even when you have plenty of supports in place.

    Have you asked if there is a program that would help you get a car? Here we have one that will give you 1500.00 for a downpayment on a car, any car, so that you can either find a job or get to work. Stepgfg used it. My friend uses it. (she keeps buying bad cars) And a neighbor has used it. Wonderful program. Helps get people to work and keep them out of the county assitance programs. Win/win situation.

    Hang in there. It will happen for you. I know it's frustrating and depressing as all heck. But don't hold it all inside where it can eat at you. We've got big shoulders around here.

  4. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member

    I was going to say the same thing as Lisa...dont feel so down on yourself. You are not abusing the system. You are the type of person it was made for. The person that is going through a rough time and wants help to get back on his/her feet so that they can move forward! You dont want to stay on assistance for the rest of your life.

    Do you have a bus system where you live? We dont but many places do. We have recently put in a sort of transportation system that runs in certain areas of our city during business hours. How about public housing...have you applied there? If you are going to be homeless soon that can move you up the line quickly. I know its not ideal or what one wants to live in but some of them can be decent.

    If you really talk to the case workers at job search and tell them that you want to find a job and what your degree is in and that you do not want to be on assistance at all...you may be surprised at how much they can help you. Most people really dont want the help and when someone is more than willing they go out of their way. I know...I worked for them.
  5. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    hey kiddo ,

    Well all the times that you DID work - paid a portion into assistance - so that it would be there when you had a rough patch - like now. I wouldn't feel ashamed (but know how you feel) and if you feel THAT bad about it - pay it back.

    As far as people giving you things (even bus tokens) you are finding out that the world is very unkind. I walked everywhere for so long. I hated taking the bus - so I walked and eventually got a bike. I got a sexy figure from riding the bike and now sometimes think - Maybe I should ditch the car? I had a better body then. lol

    Your mood is to be expected, but know that it will be what you make it. Try to find at least 3 things every morning that you have that others don't. It helps keep your focus in perspective as it's really very easy to get woe is me. I know - personally on this one. I'm thankful for my health, the roof over my head, my family, my dog, a pair of shoes that fit when my feet swell, the fact that I am trying to loose weight and have 1 pair of pants that still fit, that my cat uses the outside for a litter box and I don't have to scoop poop, that cheerios are frosted, that i can see, that I have what I have because I worked for it.

    When you go for an interview or fill out an application in person - GET A BUSINESS CARD. It's a good record with address, phone # of where you've been. If you have done the other on line - see if you can email them instead of print them out from your send file - that way you don't waste paper and ink you may not have.
    Copy, paste - email to your social worker.

    Keep checking with the local churches - and see if they have food pantrys to help out R & D- they may appreciate that. While you look for a place and job.

    YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!! I KNOW YOU CAN !!!!!

    ps YOu don't have to be thankful that my cat goes toilet outside - BuT i sure am!
  6. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Doesn't the college you went to have a job search through the program you graduated from??? Anything?
    Does your Church offer you any support???? It sounds like you are highly Religious? Do you go to Church? Don't most Churches offer some sort of support??? Sorry I have no knowledge of the House of the Holy workings.... One would think they would support/help their own???

    United way? Jobs, help anything???
    What about a YMCA, they have pretty good day care and maybe they would have a job??? United Way donates a lot to them as well???

    I don't know....
  7. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    Hang in there, girl. You'll get through this.
  8. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    You have no reason to be ashamed. Take whatever help that is available to you, and know that you are doing what's best for yourself and your son.

    You've already received some great advice from others. I think the bike idea is a great one. I know that here in Toronto, the police have an auction every year of all the stolen bikes that have been recovered and not claimed by their owners. You can get a very good quality bike for a really good price. Second-hand sports equipment shops might be another option.

    Try to stay positive, as much as you can. It will have a good effect on how the companies you are interviewing with perceive you. Your attitude (positive or negative) creates an impression, as much as your resume, skills, etc.

    Hang in there,
    Sending {{{{{Hugs}}}}} and prayers your way.

  9. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Aaaargh! That IS frustrating! I hope you get it cleared up asap and find a really neat, really good paying job. I've got my fingers crossed for you.