I may be a little off my game for the next two weeks

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by DammitJanet, Nov 23, 2011.

  1. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    This is the start of a bad time for me. I dont really do well with the holidays anyway but with not having Keyana this year or Jamie's family either its going to be tougher on me, add to that the fact that this Sunday will be the day my mom died 6 years ago and then on 12/2 my dad died last year and then he was buried 12/7. So for the next two weeks exactly its gonna be tough.
  2. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    (((hugs))) Janet.

    Last year december was really tough on us. Xmas was always an enormous deal to mother in law........and it made us miss her terribly. The grands are already commenting on how much they miss her. And the season without husband.....honestly, I don't know how I'm going to do at this point. I do think the girls have some secret plan to keep me so busy I don't have much time to think about it. (or maybe so they don't have much time to think about it either) But the grands are also missing husband pretty bad right now too. Not sure if it's that the shock has worn off or the holiday is triggering it. :(

    If you're off your game a bit it's understandable.
  3. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    DJ, if you want to meet up, let me know. ((HUGS))
  4. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Janet and Lisa, I will be thinking of you both so much this season. Traditions feel so not right for a while when adjusting to big losses. You are both in my thoughts and prayers. (My mom said tonight she wanted to pick up her phone to call her mom who just died in summer. --95 yrs old-- and I honestly hadn't thought of it since she didn't live here and had not been a part of thanksgiving, but my mom of course always called and we always did a group hello to her then. She is sad too. Holidays are a mixed blessing at times).

    I hope you can keep busy and your loved ones can distract you. Feel free to stop by here any time! HUGS to you both.... Buddy
  5. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

  6. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Tony and I are fighting more and more lately and I think its because I am just so unhappy with life. I think he is very irritated also with the way things have turned out with Keyana and partly blames that on me somehow.
  7. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    *hugs* to you all, Ladies.
  8. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Holoidays are difficult for so many people. I'm sorry you are feeling sad Janet. I have had years where I have had to think of holidays as just another day and not have any expectations. Anniversaries of deaths are also terribly diffiuclt and around the holidays even moreso. Be kind to yourself and don't worry if you have to take some time for yourself. We will still be here, ornery as ever.

  9. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    (((Janet))) you will be in my daily thoughts. I hope you're able to be gentle with yourself. I'm so sorry for all the triggers you're experiencing right now. Hugs
  10. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    I am so sorry Janet - you know - I know....HUGS
  11. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Hugs, Janet.
  12. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Obviously Im not sleeping. Not normal for me. I also think the dreaded menopause is hitting me so I am crying constantly and emotional as all get out. The tiniest thing sets me off. Every time I hold McKenzie she cries. That doesnt make me feel very good.
  13. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Janet, grief and menopause don't mix well. Menopause hoovers out the fanny alone, especially in the emotion dept. (I always thought perpetual pms myself)

    As for Tony seeming to blame you for Keyana..........well, he needs someone to focus his anger on and you happen to be available. husband did that over katie all the time. Thankfully for him, I was beyond menopause.

    As for Mickey, some babies are just that way sometimes. Brandon did it with me for the longest time. But I didn't see him very often as a baby due to school. Now he's got his "Nana" on though, and you'd never guess.

  14. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Hugs Janet, I think we are about the same age, I still am having those hot flashes. I suspect that is why my appetite is less with the anxiety I normally would have handled better. It is not fun. My emotions in general dont seem to bad though....just the situational stress. I have been depressed and I have terrible pms too. I hate that cry over everything feeling and the only reason I dont get too out of sorts from it is that it is so predictable that it will be over in a few days. Sounds like you didn't get that relief.

    Go ahead and cry. Let it out if you can... you can keep posting here.. I am up for now, Q is still up. rare, but it happens to him once in a while. when he is obsessing about something. He has been quiet for several minutes not, here is hoping he is falling asleep. I need to go to bed too. Sending you a prayer and hug! Dee
  15. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    HUGS......will you have Keyanna at Christmas?
  16. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member


    Hugs to you. It's a lot for you to deal with right now - Tony is displacing his anger and frustration. You two need to talk before it goes further. He is probably upset about how life has changed the last six months - Keyana leaving is a huge piece I'm sure, then there is the fact that you are almost confined to bed and can't do the things you did this time last year - not only does he have to pitch in do some of those things, but he is witnessing your pain and frustration too.

    And, the fact that you are dealing with so much on your plate - added to that plate is also menopause and some depression - it doesn't create an environment typical for "joy" between couples.

    I know how much Tony loves and cares for you - I heard it in his voice when he talked about meeting you and finding you sitting on his front porch when he came home from work. And I know you love him as well. Remember those feelings and that love and ask Tony to come and sit on the bed and talk. You know, relationships are work - and with so many tough things going on in your lives right now, you need each other!

    Hugs to you Janet.

  17. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    You're going to be off your game for a week or two? PFT........

    You've been off your NUT for years........girrrrrrrr friend..........

    Whatever you need me to do - Lemme know........I LOVE YOU GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll be the hoops to your YO YO........

    I'll be the R2D2 to your C320 ---------

    I'll be the Gilbert to your SUllivan.......

    I'll be the Burns to your Allen..........

    I'll be the Rice to your Krispies........

    I'll be the (running out of brain power here - )

    I'll be the Xanax to your Sewer Weasle.......

    You just let me know