I need to make it to graduation. Still two and a half more weeks!

Californiablonde

Well-Known Member
You all know how I can't stand my job. I hate it, detest it, loathe it, and despise it. I am looking hard for another job. So far, no luck. In the meantime I am VERY overwhelmed, stressed, and anxious. Now that it's the end of the year, the truancy rates have gotten WAY worse. I can't even enjoy my weekends anymore. They are spent obsessing about coming back to work on Monday and all the phone calls I will have to make. I am a Christian woman, and I have been taught all my life never to hate anyone, but at this points I INTENSELY dislike my new boss for completely changing my job description and making me one miserable woman!

My one consoling though is that graduation is finally on June 23rd, and then the phone calls will stop for two and a half glorious months. I am anxiously counting down the days, and hoping nothing bad happens till then. I have never wanted summer vacation SO bad. I just started seeing a new therapist. So far I have only seen her once, and I go back this Thursday. Last time I saw her all she wanted to talk about was my daughter. Yes, my daughter is one huge source of stress in my life, but right now my job trumps having to deal with my daughter. I really really need help on how to deal with this horrible job anxiety. On Thursday, I am going to bring it up right away, before she can start talking about anything else. It's gotten so bad, I just know I will be obsessing all summer about going back to work in September. I don't know if I will even be able to enjoy my vacation. Wish me luck I can make it through this and I survive until June 23rd!
 

Copabanana

Well-Known Member
Hi CB
On Thursday, I am going to bring it up right away, before she can start talking about anything else.
This is what I would do: At the beginning of the session I would state my intent. If she balks, say "my greatest stress right now is my work. I need to focus on that, please. If she balks, interrupt her and refocus the session again. If she does it again, say this: It will not be useful for me to discuss my daughter or anything other than work, today. (Then wait for a response.) If she continues tell her: I will not be returning. This is not useful to me. Please bill me for 20 minutes, or whatever the time is that you have used. If she is negative, tell her: I will be reporting you on ethics charges with the State Board.

You control the session. You are paying her. She works for you.
Wish me luck I can make it through this and I survive until June 23rd!
Good luck!! You can do it and you will. I will be returning to work tomorrow *after 3 and a half years not working. I have been very scared and anxious. I do not hate my work but sometimes people in my workplace are mean to me. I hate people to be mean to me.

I am also afraid just to be anxious--having demands put on me--after living without structure for so long. So, please wish me luck. You will be my role model because I know how long you have been struggling with this abusive boss and re-definition of your job duties. And you have prevailed.

I only have to work 6 months this time. That is the time limit I have set for myself. (I am an independent contractor, thus, 6 months is the shortest period I can promise.)

Why not do a countdown, CB. Every day you can check in and we can cheer you own. I will not say, like a marathon, because you are already in the home stretch. The last 100 yards where the crowd is going wild, they are throwing cold water on the runners, and you can taste the finish. We are here for you CB.
 

Ironbutterfly

If focused on a single leaf you won't see the tree
Have you tried a head-hunter for a new job? What about a temp agency? Lot of times they turn into permanent jobs. What about working two jobs vs. one awful one.What about looking for a work at home job? Computer, phone, answering calls for companies, etc. What about taking a course over the summer to give you additional employability skils? My girlfriend took a medical terminology course online and she got a job as a ward clerk at a hospital. She was Manager at a bank and had a boss from hell- the stress was horrible with bad employees and they pushed you to sell more and more bank products and services. My sister in law worked at bank for 38 years- got so bad, she went on a medical leave. When she came back they fired her. She was so upset. But she got hired at COSCO as head teller (manages all the cash, credit cards, balancing, etc). She loves it. Never been happier.

I agree with therapist, she is working for you, you are paying her to talk about what you need and what is most pressing.
 

Ironbutterfly

If focused on a single leaf you won't see the tree
Good luck!! You can do it and you will. I will be returning to work tomorrow *after 3 and a half years not working. I have been very scared and anxious. I do not hate my work but sometimes people in my workplace are mean to me. I hate people to be mean to me.

I am also afraid just to be anxious--having demands put on me--after living without structure for so long. So, please wish me luck. You will be my role model because I know how long you have been struggling with this abusive boss and re-definition of your job duties. And you have prevailed.

YOU know COPA, you just need to go in there and kick butt- exude confidence in your job skill. I hate mean people too and I know it can be stressful to have work with those folks. But kill them with kindness. Bring in cupcakes or donuts to them. And smile, don't let them see your fear- people pick up on that. Confidence baby. YOU can do this.
 

Californiablonde

Well-Known Member
Hi CBThis is what I would do: At the beginning of the session I would state my intent. If she balks, say "my greatest stress right now is my work. I need to focus on that, please. If she balks, interrupt her and refocus the session again. If she does it again, say this: It will not be useful for me to discuss my daughter or anything other than work, today. (Then wait for a response.) If she continues tell her: I will not be returning. This is not useful to me. Please bill me for 20 minutes, or whatever the time is that you have used. If she is negative, tell her: I will be reporting you on ethics charges with the State Board.

You control the session. You are paying her. She works for you.
Good luck!! You can do it and you will. I will be returning to work tomorrow *after 3 and a half years not working. I have been very scared and anxious. I do not hate my work but sometimes people in my workplace are mean to me. I hate people to be mean to me.

I am also afraid just to be anxious--having demands put on me--after living without structure for so long. So, please wish me luck. You will be my role model because I know how long you have been struggling with this abusive boss and re-definition of your job duties. And you have prevailed.

I only have to work 6 months this time. That is the time limit I have set for myself. (I am an independent contractor, thus, 6 months is the shortest period I can promise.)

Why not do a countdown, CB. Every day you can check in and we can cheer you own. I will not say, like a marathon, because you are already in the home stretch. The last 100 yards where the crowd is going wild, they are throwing cold water on the runners, and you can taste the finish. We are here for you CB.
Copa, I wish you the best of luck in your new job. You got this!
 

Californiablonde

Well-Known Member
,It keeps feeling like I have the stomach flu. I have been feeling like this on and off for months. I keep having cramping severe nausea, abdominal pain, intermittent diarrhea, and (sorry if too much information) but very light colored stools. I can't help but keep thinking cancer. My ex's sister died of stomach cancer last year and she was only in her early fifties. She had many of the same symptoms I have. I am worried. I keep putting off seeing my doctor, but now I know I must make an appointment at the end of the month, when I have some extra money. I just want to feel normal again physically and mentally. Ugh!
 

InsaneCdn

Well-Known Member
Stress throws our entire body for a tail-spin. Stress alone MAY account for every one of those symptoms, especially chronic stress. And chronic stress is bad for your health.

One way or another, there has to be help for that anxiety. So that you can then figure out what is left that is actually a physical problem.
 

pigless in VA

Well-Known Member
CB, I think you are just overly stressed. Think of it this way, you're on the stress diet. You'll lose weight quickly. Please banish the thoughts of stomach cancer. You have boss cancer, not stomach cancer. Your doctor will confirm my diagnosis soon. Hang in there and take some Imodium (but not a lot). Big, warm, squeezy hugs.:hugs:
 

ksm

Well-Known Member
I agree with Pigless...she gave you a good second opinion, and I concur... And neither of us will send a bill! Try to turn off the negative self talk. Easy for someone else to say.

When you do see your doctor, besides telling him the symptoms, please explain your work situation and the stress you are under.

KSM
 
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