If it's not one thing it's another. Sigh

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Californiablonde, Mar 19, 2013.

  1. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    So before I found a place to live, I asked one of the assistant principals here at the school I work if it would be okay for difficult child to go to our school even if another school in the district happened to be her home school. He placed a call to district office and they said, sure, she could transfer as long as she lived within district boundaries. He told me he would approve it as an admin transfer. This gave me free reign to find an apartment anywhere in the city. So I got the apartment, and as it turns out, my school is not our home school. No biggie. Figured we would just do the admin transfer like the principal said we would.

    So this morning I call district office and introduced myself to find out what we need to do to get the admin transfer started. The lady who answered the phone was incredibly rude. She told me that as far as she's concerned there is no such thing as an admin transfer. I would need to put in a request like everybody else. She then told me that just because I work at the school I do not get special treatment above anybody else. I did not expect special treatment. The only reason why I told her who I was is so she would know why I am requesting a transfer in the first place. I would like my child to attend the same school I work. She then reiterated that I was no one special, an admin has no right to accept my daughter just because of my position at the school, and there was no guarantee she would even be accepted. So I thought no big deal I will just put in a regular request like everyone else. I happen to know that there is plenty of room at my school so it shouldn't be a problem letting her in.

    So then I drop the bomb that she's Special Education. Suddenly that changed everything. The lady then tells me no way is she going to allow my daughter to tranfer to my school. I would first need to enroll her at her home school, then get her started there, then have a transition IEP. That could take weeks. So I am supposed to start her at another school then get her transferred and have her start yet another school in the same year? I don't think so. So the lady ended up giving me the number to the Special Education department. I called over there and got the same answer. difficult child would need to be enrolled at the other school first and then, if our school even has the proper placement for her, she could transfer here. So Friday I am supposed to go to address verification and get her enrolled. I am in a panic. If I knew it was going to be this difficult I might have moved within my school zone. So now the school psychiatric, who has already reviewed her IEP and tri annual psychiatric report, is expecting her to start next week. I emailed him today to see if there is anything I can do to go above district's head on this one. And then there's the assistant principal who is also the director of Special Education. She does not come back into the office till Thursday. I am going to ask her if there's anything that can be done. I am crossing fingers and praying I can get my daughter transferred to my school ASAP without any problems. Till then I just wait it out and see.
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    I know, I'm a broken record. But... you need somebody other than you, and not your Mom. You need a body that THEY recognize as an advocate.
  3. Liahona

    Liahona Guest

    Yes an advocate. She could be completely making stuff up and you would never know. You've been through worse you can do this.
  4. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    CB, I agree with IC and Lia - and let me add something I did not know till recently. At least in my neck of the woods, an IEP/Special Education means open enrollment. Period. Even if the school doesn't participate in open enrollment, or have the "resources". Home school pays for the resources - but since it is in the same district it should be a snap.
  5. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    I think yout best thing to do would be to talk to the Asst. Principal on Thurs. This person is the head of sp. ed. and can totaaly hook you up. The other people you spoke to just don't know what transpired between you and this person. They sure can do special favors.
  6. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    I agree talking to the assistant principal in charge of Special Education is the best way to go. I just wish she was here now. She won't be back in to the office till Thursday. Till then I'm gonna be an anxious wreck.
  7. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Until then, start working toward an advocate. You need one anyway. Even if just for the "real" scoop on what your difficult child's rights are. DOING something productive helps counter the anxiety. Plus... if plan A doesn't work... you will then have an advocate to fall back on.
  8. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Well now my mom found out they are giving me hassles and she's flipping out on me. Demanding to know who I talked to. Insisting I must have gotten the wrong information. Demanded the school psychiatric's number so she can talk to him. I told her there's not much I can do till I talk to the director of Special Education but she's determined. Who knows, she might actually get some where.
  9. buddy

    buddy New Member

    I agree talk to the sp. ed person but just in case......if they make you jump hoops could you consider:

    1)drive to old school for the last little bit of school while doing the transfer stuff.
    2) send her to home school but don't move to desired school till next year. a more natural transition.
    3) check out the local school. I personally would never work where my behavior challenged child went to school. Makes it very tough if there is ever a conflict.
  10. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member


    please implore your mother to leave off. You need to handle this yourself. The last thing you need is someone else calling and rocking the boat.

    My advice is to wait until Thursday and speak with the asst prin in person. Until then, think positive, deep breaths, stay calm. She/he will be probably be busy their first day back so be understanding and patient with their schedule. Is there an administrative support person that can schedule an appointment in the afternoon of their return?

    Certainly school districts have procedures to be followed -- but when you are staff at a school, they can usually make allowances. Do your best to not worry until you have all the answers.

    That would be my advice.

  11. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Yes please! I erased this, but the sp ed person may have been able to do it quietly but if feathers are ruffled she could catch flack for going against the system. She wants her job and you want a nice work environment. Schools are full of politics and admin sticks together usually.
    Pls tell mom, no thank you.
  12. FlowerGarden

    FlowerGarden Active Member

    I used to work in the same school district my difficult child went to. The school psychologist and vice principal mishandled a situation with difficult child & then with me. I wound up quitting my job because of what happened and because I was being advised by counselors to sue the school district. We decided not to sue the district but I could never go back to the district because they hurt me so much. I could never find a job that paid as well and had the same hours, after that.
  13. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Talked to school psychiatric and he is going over to the home school today. He was headed over there anyway to observe a Special Education kid so he's not making the trip just because of me. But he said he would speak to the Special Education department there and see if we can bypass the IEP and have her start here. He says it will probably take a few days to get it all sorted out and difficult child will probably have to wait until the middle of next week to start school instead of Monday, but that's okay. He is sure we can get her transferred here no problem. So he put my mind at ease. He also told me which teacher he is recommending she start with. She will have mainstream PE and most likely an art class for an elective, and three Special Education classes. The Special Education teacher he thinks will be best for her is the one I am not very familiar with. But I am sure I will get to know him really well very soon. And we will have an IEP in 30 days after difficult child is observed to see if she can possibly be mainstreamed in an academic class. I am not putting any bets on difficult child being ready to be maistreamed after only 30 days in a brand new school, but who knows she may surprise us all. So anyway things aren't as bad as they seemed and I think difficult child will get along fine here at this school and it will all work out in the end.
  14. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    I just talked to the school psychiatric again and he says he is going to talk to the head of district and get her approved to start immediately. What a relief! So now I just have to wait till Friday to go down and enroll her here. I wish Friday would hurry up and get here. I have so much to do and I'm getting anxious. I just want the move over and done with already!
  15. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    CB... you can pack? and move? in two days?

    Umm... I can't even imagine.

    It would take us two months to pack. No, I'm not exaggerating.
    We could probably transport (load, drive, unload) in three days.
    And another 6 months to unpack.

    If I were you, I'd start packing.
  16. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    I don't need to pack. I just need to move.
  17. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I can understand your angst. I would be a wreck. Getting all that done in such a short time is so hectic. I was pretty sure you could get the school stuff figured out because I know here its almost a given that school staff can opt to have their kids attend the school they work for if they wish to have them there. Some dont of course because it causes more issues.
  18. buddy

    buddy New Member

    You don't need to pack? You must be pretty organized! It took me weeks. LOL
  19. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    Wow, I'm kind of jealous. if we were to move, it would probably take us months to pack and go through our things. Not only house, but all the barns, sheds and stables that are full of stuff. Half that is not even ours but something that father in law and mother in law left behind when they built a new house next door and moved there. And yeah, there are also much stuff father in law's parents left behind when his dad died and mom moved to first nearby city and then to Spain. And most likely that is not even the oldest sediment. Joys of house that has been in family for a long time. While house itself is only about 120 or 130 years old, our oldest barns go back at least 200 or 250 years. And I'm not at all sure they have ever been totally cleaned and emptied after that. I kind of hope we never have to do that but we will live here till we have to move some sort of senior housing where you only take few of your own things with. And leave it to our sons to sort it all out. ;)
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2013
  20. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Call the state school board and talk with them. Explain the situation and then ask what you're rights are as a parent. Ours will not only quote you the law/rules, but will also wait until you have them all written down so you have something to show the schools when you go in to talk to them.

    Now I dunno about other state school boards, but ours will not only do that but will request you call back and tell them how it went because they are smart enough to know that schools try not to comply if they think they can get away with it. If the school doesn't comply? Our SSB comes down on them HARD. Next thing you know you have a phone call with some very cooperative people.

    I like to know for certain where I stand when it comes to things such as this.